Your kid and my kid are not playing in the pros

[Jumper_Dad]

I agree with most of your post. And parents, and I have been guilty of this, take a kid's game too seriously for one reason or another. The reason may not always be however what it appears.

 

On the subject of coaches, there are many good fair ones, and there are some that aren't. But, I can tell you absolutely from experience that the bad ones and some of the goods ones are very influenced by parents. Vocal parents, financially contributing parents, prior association parents, etc. and a 6-8-12-14-16-18 year old is seldom equipped to make a good case for themselves. Talking to a coach should be a last resort of a parent, and it should be in the form of a question: is there something xxx should be doing better that we should know about?

 

Lastly, we are one of those who moved and transferred a basketball player after his sophomore year. Contrary to some opinion, it had nothing to do with playing time. It had everything to do with getting him in a total environment where he would be happier and could succeed.

I agree favoritism does come into play for a lot of coaches, and they are poor coaches in my mind.

[theguru]

I think he goes overboard with some of it, but I agree with the author's overall premise.

 

EXACTLY! Perspective people.

[theguru]

So you don't agree with him?

 

Strike Two.

[mexitucky]

His theory that if your kids are actively involved in sports, you're a bad parent is laughable.

 

You missed the part where your marriage will automatically crumble due to the stress of their practice schedule.

[theguru]

You missed the part where your marriage will automatically crumble due to the stress of their practice schedule.

 

I think the author addressed that saying your spouse needs to be hit upside the head and put in jail.

[mexitucky]

I think he goes overboard with some of it, but I agree with the author's overall premise.

 

He went off on a tangent. A. Select sports rob children of their childhoods, B. Select sports turn you into a hateful/spiteful parent, C. Select sports make you obnoxious as you incesstantly speak about your child, D. Your family life will be destroyed, and/or E. Select sports keep kids from being self sufficient because they focus on only one sport?

 

He doesn't even bring up the best argument against specialization, and that is injury from over-use.

He speaks in generalities and stereotypes. Just because a kid picks one sport, it doesn't mean that he's headed for a life of great regret. It doesn't mean that his father is nuts. Granted there are quite a few, but it isn't an all-or-nothing like this guy makes it out to be.

[mexitucky]

I think the author addressed that saying your spouse needs to be hit upside the head and put in jail.

 

I was saying that UKMustang missed that. If your marriage fails due to an overly taxed schedule, it was doomed for failure any way.

[Randy Parker]

He went off on a tangent. A. Select sports rob children of their childhoods, B. Select sports turn you into a hateful/spiteful parent, C. Select sports make you obnoxious as you incesstantly speak about your child, D. Your family life will be destroyed, and/or E. Select sports keep kids from being self sufficient because they focus on only one sport?

 

He doesn't even bring up the best argument against specialization, and that is injury from over-use.

He speaks in generalities and stereotypes. Just because a kid picks one sport, it doesn't mean that he's headed for a life of great regret. It doesn't mean that his father is nuts. Granted there are quite a few, but it isn't an all-or-nothing like this guy makes it out to be.

 

I didn't read it as a condemnation of specialization, but more so as sports having the primary say in how families spend their time, money, energy, etc.

[theguru]

I was saying that UKMustang missed that. If your marriage fails due to an overly taxed schedule, it was doomed for failure any way.

 

I was being funny.

 

^

Softball

[theguru]

He went off on a tangent. A. Select sports rob children of their childhoods, B. Select sports turn you into a hateful/spiteful parent, C. Select sports make you obnoxious as you incesstantly speak about your child, D. Your family life will be destroyed, and/or E. Select sports keep kids from being self sufficient because they focus on only one sport?

 

He doesn't even bring up the best argument against specialization, and that is injury from over-use.

He speaks in generalities and stereotypes. Just because a kid picks one sport, it doesn't mean that he's headed for a life of great regret. It doesn't mean that his father is nuts. Granted there are quite a few, but it isn't an all-or-nothing like this guy makes it out to be.

 

I think you are missing the point of the article.

 

This author doesn't give it away and I believe that is on purpose.

[Bengal Maniac]

I understand what the author is saying and do agree in general terms he is correct. My youngest son was an outstanding soccer youth player at age 6. When he scored countless goals in rec, he was asked to join an Olympic Developmental program to enhance is skills. I have no idea if he was good enough ( I was a high school soccer coach at the time). It was going to be extensive travel, major expense, and overall way too much energy for one kid when you have others. I refused to do it and was told I'd regret it. I haven't one time.

 

The chances of him being a world class or even national elite, were not reasonable and very unlikely, although he was outstanding and was more skilled than the vast majority at his age. There were a few others offered also and some of them went. not one of them became a national player and all were very good high school players. My son started as a Sophomore in high school at a very good program. He blew his knee out in his third game his junior year and never was the same.

 

He did receive a full academic scholarship and that has served him well. Bottom line for me. I will always put my time and efforts mostly in emphasis of a solid academic foundation. Sports have many great qualities that are and were beneficial for him. I also enjoyed going to his games.

 

For me, I do just shake my head with all this sports mania by some. To each his/her own, however.

[OlDog75]

I always wondered what happened to the kids that got picked last in gym class.

 

They now own athletic teams.

[hoops5]

You missed the part where your marriage will automatically crumble due to the stress of their practice schedule.

 

I was saying that UKMustang missed that. If your marriage fails due to an overly taxed schedule, it was doomed for failure any way.

All kidding aside--I think that kids sports actually connects and enriches the marriage and provides a common ground, and fosters common interests.

[FanofMany33]

I told my kids to never let someone else tell them what they could or could not accomplish and to pursue their dreams, and our jobs as parents would be to facilitate. They did not have to pick sports, or music or whatever. I get the jist of the article, but pursuit and support of higher goals, whatever the field, beats the heck out of mastering video games and keeping up with the latest TV show.

 

They were not allowed to do this however at the expense of doing all the other things we need to do...attend school, make good grades, be a good person....

 

It would seem to me the writer has a burr up his butt about something.

 

Well Said! This article was written for losers, and non dreamers. Yes the odds are there, but to put that thought in the mind of yourself as a parent, sets you up to not support your kid's dreams. It's a cop out.

 

Professional sports is like a business or a job. If you have the qualifications to at least be able to apply for a position, why not try. Not every pro athlete is a top notch draft pick, but one who may have had those dreams as a child and stuck with them, applied when the time came and made it. Don't be a quitter because of the odds!

You groom your kid as a child and they continue to pursue if they choose to.

[BigVMan23]

Blowhard. His premise is correct. Some of what he stated is correct. A lot of it were generalizations and stereotypes. I can't TELL you the number of kids who BEG their parents to play summer/travel/select ball.