Alzheimer's sucks

[All Tell]

My uncle passed this morning after a battle with this incideous disease. In the last few years he literally lost everyone, not even knowing his wife of almost 60 years. My mother has now started showing early signs of it. Absolutly terrifying.

[plantmanky]

Prayers.

[True blue (and gold)]

It is a very scary thing. My grandmother passed away due to it in 1996.

 

Prayers for you, All Tell.

[Qryche11]

Sucks to hear anyone dealing with this.

[rockmom]

Prayers, All Tell. My grandmother had Alzheimer's. It broke my dad's heart. He adored his mother and they had always had a special relationship. She would refuse to see him because she believed her son was in a bassinet at the foot of her bed. It is a heart wrenching disease. My prayers are with you and your family.

[nees1212]

Sorry for your loss, and yes, the disease sucks. Both my grandmothers have it.

[mcpapa]

Sad to hear, AT. We are thinking of you and your family.

 

I've never had a relative (that I know of) that has been stricken. But to be absolutely honest, every time (and they're more frequent as I get older) I misplace something or forget a thought that was in my head just a moment ago, I worry a bit.

[kygirl]

Thoughts and prayers to you All Tell & your family. Alzheimer's such a terrible disease that I've watched with good friends, rob them of their memory.

[All Tell]

I can't imagine what it's like to basically lose your entire life like that. It has got to be terrifying. My uncle had a rich, full life. He traveled the world, he loved horse racing and was a yearly Derby goer, in fact I was lucky enough to sit in his Derby box several times. He has a large, wonderful and close knit family with lots of kids, grandkids and nieces and nephews. And with all that he had the wonderful memories that went with them. This horrid disease took all of those from him. Now I see my mother with memory issues that have been worsening the last few years. She still remembers people but her short term storage capacity is very bad. She had to be told several times yesterday that her brother had died. It is heartbreaking to wat h it happen to someone you love.

[Run To State]

My thoughts and prayers are with you, All Tell. I'm very sorry to hear your uncle passed and that he had this horrible disease. Very sad to know your mom has been diagnosed as well. My prayers for both of them, you and your family.

 

This really hits home for me, so I understand what you're going through. My dad is in an Altzheimer's facility now and it's been really hard watching as the disease progresses. He can be okay, then suddenly he gets more confused and often, angry. One day he seems to know me, the next he will talk about me as if I'm not there. The other day he was extremely agitated, he would cuss at me, call me a liar and other more 'colorful' names. Didn't matter how calmly I would talk to him or how agreeable I would try to be, he remained agitated. He often talks about things in a very nonsensical manner, I do my best to sort it out and carry on a conversation, but I get lost and feel worried I'll say the wrong thing and agitate him again. Often, he will be thinking in the past but speaks as if it's in the now, which I realize is part of the disease, but it's so sad and heartbreaking to witness.

 

All Tell, if there is anything I can do to help you, don't hesitate to ask. Even if you just need someone to talk to, let me know and I'll give you my cell number. Know you aren't alone and others are willing to try to help you through this. God bless.

[Run To State]

This really hits home for me, so I understand what you're going through. My dad is in an Altzheimer's facility now and it's been really hard watching as the disease progresses. He can be okay, then suddenly he gets more confused and often, angry. One day he seems to know me, the next he will talk about me as if I'm not there. The other day he was extremely agitated, he would cuss at me, call me a liar and other more 'colorful' names. Didn't matter how calmly I would talk to him or how agreeable I would try to be, he remained agitated. He often talks about things in a very nonsensical manner, I do my best to sort it out and carry on a conversation, but I get lost and feel worried I'll say the wrong thing and agitate him again. Often, he will be thinking in the past but speaks as if it's in the now, which I realize is part of the disease, but it's so sad and heartbreaking to witness.

 

 

What adds to the difficulty of this for us is my dad's wife (my stepmom) has dementia. We have to continually remind her of why he can't come home and why she can't take care of him. Honestly, she shouldn't be living at home by herself at this point IMO, but that isn't a decision that's mine to make. I feel really bad for her, she just wants him home with her. It's just so sad.

[mexitucky]

Lost my Grandpa in 1993. Condolences, bc that is an awfully difficult thing to watch and try to support.

[Sportsaholic Mamaw]

All tell, so sorry to hear about your loss. I, too, have had the experience. My mother-in-law started to forget little things and we just thought it was a part of aging. But then she would get dressed for mass and I would go to pick her up and she would be sitting on the sofa and no idea of why. We moved her to our house and tried to make her room look just like home with all her things. Each time she would get sick or have a fall, the disease progressed. She finally knew no one except me because I was with her 24/7. Nights I sat by her bed to make sure she did not get up, or try to crawl over the bedside railings or to make sure she did not take her oxygen off. There were days that I never had my shoes off except to shower. Afternoons were bad because she had Sundown Syndrome from 2 p.m. until we could get her to bed. I don't regret a single minute I spent with this gentle lady and she passed away surrounded by all her family at "home". It's a horrid disease and I watch Papaw, her son, to watch for any symptoms. I too will take your calls or PM me if you need a shoulder to lean on. Hang in there and most of all, know that you are not alone.

[All Tell]

Thanks to all for the kind words. My mother hasn't been diagnosed with Alzheimer's, she has been diagnosed with dementia but otherwise she's in pretty good health. It's tough, she remembers people but it you tell her something and 5 minutes later it's completely gone. In the evenings she gets very moody and says things that my mother would never say in language she would never use. It's horrible. I'm also starting to see the toll it's taking on my father. Dad is completely devoted to Mom and they are approaching 60 years together. It is very upsetting to see how it has affected both of them.

[oldgrappler]

My mother suffers from this dread disease. Here's a story of how one woman responded to her husband's concern over his advancing disease and what it would do to their relationship. I hope it may bring some comfort to those who love someone with this disease.

 

Roger Zerbe suffered from early onset Alzheimer's disease. His wife, Becky, remembers a journal entry he left for her after a particularly troubling bout of forgetfulness.

 

"I picked up the journal on my pillow and read:

 

Honey,

Today fear is taking over. The day is coming when all my memories of this life we share will be gone. In fact, you and the boys will be gone from me. I will lose you even as I am surrounded by you and your love. I don't want to leave you. I want to grow old in the warmth of memories. Forgive me for leaving so slowly and painfully.

Blinking back tears, I picked up my pen and wrote:

 

My sweet husband,

What will happen when we get to the point where you no longer know me? I will continue to go on loving you and caring for you—not because you know me or remember our life, but because I remember you. I will remember the man who proposed to me and told me he loved me, the look on his face when his children were born, the father he was, the way he loved our extended family. I'll recall his love for riding, hiking, and reading; his tears at sentimental movies; the unexpected witty remarks; and how he held my hand while he prayed. I cherish the pleasure, obligation, commitment, and opportunity to care for you because I REMEMBER YOU!"

 

(from Becky Zerbe, "Penning a Marriage," Marriage Partnership (Spring 2006), p. 22)