It's Michigan Week. We want your best Michigan Joke! OK, U of M fans can also play.

[bugatti]

I got these off of http://columbusoh.about.com/gi/dynamic/offsite.htm?zi=1/XJ&sdn=columbusoh&zu=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.rivalfanatics.com%2Fjokes.htm

 

Q: What are the three hardest years in the life of a Michigan Wolverine fan?

A: Second Grade.

 

Q: How many Michigan freshman does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: None, it's a sophomore course

 

Q: What is the difference between Michigan and Frosted Flakes?

A: Frosted Flakes know what to do in a Bowl.

 

Q: If 3 Michigan players are in a car, then who is driving?

A: A police officer.

 

Q: What do you get when you cross a Michigan football player with a groundhog?

A: Six more weeks of bad football.

 

Capital One is hiring Maurice Clarett for a new series of upcoming commercials.

 

He'll be outside of a stadium holding a gun yelling, "What's in your wallet?"

 

 

 

Lloyd Carr, clearly upset about the Michigan Wolverine's loss to the Oregon Ducks, decides to find out from Jim Tressel what his winning secret is. Carr travels to an OSU practice and asks Tressel, "Coach, how is it that your team is so good? What's your secret?"

 

Tressel, trying to be helpful, responds by calling Craig Krenzel over and asks him, "Craig, who's your fathers brother's nephew? Krenzel answers, "Why coach, that's easy? it's me." Tressel turns to Carr and says, "See, that's the secret, Lloyd. A smart quarterback? You've got to have a smart quarterback!"

 

Thinking he's finally got all the tools he needs, Carr returns to Michigan and the Wolverine workout. He promptly calls over John Navarre. "Hey, Navarre! Who's your father's brother's nephew?"

 

John looks perplexed, thinks a bit and says, "Coach, I'll have to get back to you after practice on that, okay? Carr, disgusted, says okay.

 

During practice, Navarre calls over Chris Perry. "Hey, Chris, Coach just asked me the weirdest question? "Who's your father's brother's nephew?" Perry answers, "Duh? That's pretty simple? It's me!"

 

After practice, Navarre catches up with Carr and says, "Hey, Coach, I have the answer to your question! My father's brother's nephew is Chris Perry!"

 

Carr (very angry with Navarre) says, "No, No, No! You idiot! It's Craig Krenzel!"

[IAmAFan]

Mo Cla walks into a bar.....

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Then he pulls a gun and tries to rob someone of their CELL PHONE... :lol: :lol:

 

Only a Buckeye could be so stupid...

 

 

That's the funnies post ever on BGP!!!!!

[gametime]

I'm no longer in a joking mood... :cry:

[bugatti]

I'm no longer in a joking mood... :cry:

I do not blame you, GT... I do not want to say I feel bad for posting the previous jokes, but the passing of a legend puts things in perspective and makes us realize a big reason this thread is created is because of the past work of Bo.

[Wireman]

I'll Start if off.

Why did Mrs Schembechler always put Bo's Cheerios on a plate?

 

Because if they were in a Bowl he'd lose them. :jump:

 

 

 

 

 

One more.

How do you get a Meat-Chicken Grad off your front porch?

 

Pay him for the Pizza! :lol:

 

 

 

Go Bucks! Beat Blue!

 

Not too funny now.

[Wireman]

Q: What do you call a good looking girl on the Ohio State campus?

 

A: A visitor.

[Wireman]

Go Michigan!

[LRCW]

I'll be fair.........

 

 

Q: What do you call a good looking girl on the University of Michigan campus?

A: A visitor.

 

 

 

 

 

Q: What do you call a good looking girl on the Ohio State campus?

 

A: A visitor.

 

 

 

 

C'mon Wireman. YOu need to work a little harder. :lol: :lol:

[Wireman]

C'mon Wireman. YOu need to work a little harder. :lol: :lol:

 

We both used a Google search to find that joke. I just changed the names to protect the innocent, LOL.

[Wireman]

At least my church sign was original!

[andigidy]

Twas the night before game time,

 

And all round the shoe,

 

Not a creature was sleeping,

 

They were screaming Beat Blue.

 

The banners were hung by the lamp posts with care

 

In hopes that St. Troy would find Ginn through the air.

 

Drunken and crazy and burning their beds,

 

While visions of kick off danced through their heads.

 

When all of a sudden there arose such a clatter,

 

I sprang from the keg to see what was the matter.

 

When there in the sky, in a Coupe Deville sleigh,

 

Was Woody Hayes decked out in scarlet and gray.

 

He looked on the crowd that was gathered around,

 

And said that he heard that a game was in town.

 

I came here to watch it, and wish you good luck.

 

Though it's not like you need it, cause Michigan Sucks!

:thumb:

[UKFan16]

I'll be fair.........

 

 

Q: What do you call a good looking girl on the University of Michigan campus?

A: A visitor.

 

Q: What does the average Ohio State student get on his SAT?

A: Drool

 

Q: What do you get when you breed a groundhog and a University of Michigan grad?

A: Six more weeks of bad football.

 

Q: How many Ohio State Freshmen does it take to change a light bulb?

A: None, it's a Junior course.

 

Big Finish

 

A University of Michigan fan walks into a doctor's office and removes his hat to reveal a frog sitting on his head. The doctor asks, "How can I help you?" The frog replies, "I was wondering if you could help me get this wart off my butt."

 

 

 

I think these jokes better on OSU because Michigan is a better academic university:thumb:

[UKBLUE1964]

I got this joke at work it is really good if your a Buckeye fan.

 

 

 

It is late in the OSU-Michigan game on an overcast day. Michigan has the ball on the OSU 3 with 2 seconds left, and down 14 -10. There is time for one more play.

Lloyd Carr calls timeout. As the team is coming to the sideline, Lloyd looks to the heavens and says, "God, I've have been a good man. A churchgoing man. I've tried to do what's right and I've Never asked you anything. But, this is a big game and if I could get a little guidance, I would be forever grateful.

The clouds part, sun shines on Lloyd and he hears a voice bellow, " I right 39 pitch trap".

 

Lloyd can't believe it! God himself game him the play! It'll work for sure.

The team come to the sideline and Lloyd excitedly gives them the play. The timeout ends and the teams come back to the field. Lloyd can barely contain his excitement - he's going to win.

Play resumes and the ball is snapped. The Michigan QB pitches to the back. For a split second, there's a hole which is quickly filled by AJ Hawk, who tackles the Michigan back short of the goal line. Time expires and Ohio State players storm the field to celebrate. Lloyd is in shock. He can't believe the play didn't work.

Lloyd looks to the heavens and cries, "God, Why did you call THAT play?"

God looks down, shrugs turns to his right and says,

 

 

" Woody, Why did we call that play?"