Darth Vader lives, and Disney killed a little more of my childhood today.

[HT721]

Darth Vader to be resurrected | Day & Night | Express.co.uk - Home of the Daily and Sunday Express

 

Seems like I watched him die, watched them burn his body, and saw him as a ghost, how is he still alive??????

[MJAlltheWay24]

Also:

 

Fellow old favourites Luke Skywalker, Han Solo and Princess Leia – played by Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford and Carrie Fisher – have already been tipped to reprise their respective roles.

 

They are about to butcher this!

[Godot]

Say it anit so Joe

[ThrillVille Cardinal51]

So he's DV has now gone from good guy, to bad guy, back to good guy and now resurrected guy? Sheesh.

[Wireman]

Disney...you lost me Darth Vadar.

[Wireman]

He could be cloned potentially?

[LRCW]

I love it.

[Wireman]

At least we'll get to see if Luke can still use the force when he's 137 years old (like Yoda).

[Wireman]

Also, in an ironic role reversal, Carrie Fisher will be returning to the series...this time as Jabba the Hutt.

[PepRock01]

Also:

 

Fellow old favourites Luke Skywalker, Han Solo and Princess Leia – played by Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford and Carrie Fisher – have already been tipped to reprise their respective roles.

 

They are about to butcher this!

 

 

It's already been butchered by its creator. Would a pile of dung with vomit on top be that much more disgusting than a pile of dung? Because Lucas turned it into a pile of dung already.

[Jumper_Dad]

I agree that in Episode 1 (JarJar) there were some issues, but I thought EP 2 and 3 were pretty good. Think how hard it was to come up with a story line that only had one possible conclusion due to Episode 4,5 and 6 already being made.

 

I look forward to these movies from an entertainment perspective, not from a "Does it live up to what I think it should be" perspective.

[mcpapa]

It's already been butchered by its creator. Would a pile of dung with vomit on top be that much more disgusting than a pile of dung? Because Lucas turned it into a pile of dung already.

 

One thing I can't stand is a fence-straddler.

 

Tell us how you really feel for once.

[Randy Parker]

One thing I can't stand is a fence-straddler.

 

Tell us how you really feel for once.

 

:lol:

[PepRock01]

I agree that in Episode 1 (JarJar) there were some issues, but I thought EP 2 and 3 were pretty good. Think how hard it was to come up with a story line that only had one possible conclusion due to Episode 4,5 and 6 already being made.

 

I look forward to these movies from an entertainment perspective, not from a "Does it live up to what I think it should be" perspective.

 

 

Well I hate to be a negative Nancy, but they only pretty they qualify for is crappy.

 

It takes more than CGI and flashy visuals to make a good movie. If that is all it takes then play the Star Wars soundtrack on your iPod while watching a fireworks display. You will get about as much narrative depth without being hammered by terrible dialogue.

[PepRock01]

I agree that in Episode 1 (JarJar) there were some issues, but I thought EP 2 and 3 were pretty good. Think how hard it was to come up with a story line that only had one possible conclusion due to Episode 4,5 and 6 already being made.

 

I look forward to these movies from an entertainment perspective, not from a "Does it live up to what I think it should be" perspective.

 

For further information:

 

George Lucas created Star Wars, one of the best movie Trilogies ever to grace the silver screen. Less than 20 years later he completely destroyed it without regard for the people who love it.

 

Everything that was done right in the originals (pre-special edition) was ignored, scoffed, mocked and erased from the prequels. In watching Jedi yesterday in HD with Jack and Burkholder I realized that the prequels burned much of my love for Star Wars out of me. I have a hard time bringing myself to watch the originals anymore on account of the cinematic dung heaps that are the prequels. A list of problems with the new movies that have contributed to the overall destruction of the series, which is by no means exhaustive, follows.

 

1) Writing: I really cannot overstress the importance of quality writing. It doesn’t have to Shakespearian quality, but it has to be HIGHER than a 3rd grade level. I am sorry, but an opening scroll that starts out with “WAR!!!!!! EVIL IS EVERYWHERE. THERE ARE HEROES ON BOTH SIDES,” could have been written by a stupid monkey. Georgie boy, do I sense a bit of de-evolving going on over there? I mean lines like “From my point of view the Jedi are evil,” are just Lucas saying “LOOK I DID GOOD!!! REMEMBER WHEN OBI-WAN SAID THAT IN ROTJ?” I remember George, in fact probably better than you do Mr. “Laser Sword.” The situations are entirely different and you don’t have someone quite as talented as Alec Guinness to save your butt.

 

2) Directing: The right director can make the difference between good film and bad film. Lucas’ biggest mistake in making the new movies was to insist on directing them. He did a great job with ANH, but he also had a cast that was excellent with actors like Alec Guinness and Peter Cushing as anchors. Not to say anything negative about Harrison Ford, the man is a great actor, but those two were the veterans of the first film. ESB was by far the best of the lot and Lucas did not direct it, ROTJ was great as well and it was directed by Richard Marquand. I really wish he had asked his friend Steven Spielberg to direct these films. I am quite certain that they would have been at least watchable.

 

3) Special effects: I know it seems incomprehensible that I would say special effects hold the new ones back but they really do. The originals were more believable. The ships weren’t shiny, they LOOKED like they had been used, pitted and in battle. They looked like they were real. They also didn’t look like freakin’ doughnuts. Seriously folks how can a giant doughnut look intimidating. And what purpose does that serve? The only complaint I have about the design of the Imperial-class Star Destroyer is the inconvenient placement of the shield generators and the obvious lack of protection of the bridge. Other than that it is a great design in that all of its broadsides can fire in the forward arc, making it a devastating design.

 

Even the aliens were more believable. Yes, I found muppets easier to believe than creatures that look like amalgams that seem to have no logical biological backing to their structure. George Lucas is like a freakin’ child with a new toy. He sees “OOH PRETTY” and so he proceeds to create armies of shiny objects with a plethora of colors. For crying out loud this is not a freakin’ parade in San Francisco (nothing against those of that persuasion). There is no logical backing for HALF of what we see in this; Robotic tricycles that shoot clusters of rockets, weird looking things with two wheels that also shoot clusters of rockets that like to dance in mid-air, locust people with the “weirding way,” a Zerg Lurker, gangly tripods that shoot people with satellite dishes, a gallery of villains that look like they belong in a Buck Rodgers or Flash Gordon serial, obsessive use of CGI creatures because apparently despite the insane wealth generated by the Star Wars license realistic looking aliens are out of the question. I could probably write a dissertation on this, but I will cease this part here.

 

4) Continuity: Believe it or not, it usually helps when there is continuity in a story. I know Star Trek does not believe in it, but I would have hoped that an “epic space opera” would. I am too pissed to rant about these, just let it be known that continuity of the story is a big problem.

 

5) Believable Villain: I seriously had a hard time finding the Emperor evil in these films. He saw the inefficiency and the ease with which the Republic could be turned on itself, he sought unity. Okay maybe, just MAYBE I could see him that way after seeing him in Jedi, but he could be just like a crotchety old man at that point.

 

6) Republic Survived 1000 years with no army: BULL FREAKIN POOP!!! No way, sorry can’t happen. I don’t care how special the Super Best Friend Jedi are, you need a standing army in the event that something ANYTHING breaks out. It is obvious that secession is not allowed under this constitution, how exactly do they plan to enforce it? Harsh language and disapproving glares? Dear heaven I hate you George Lucas.

 

7) Mace Windu and the Jedi Bunch: I can’t say enough about how much I grew to hate the Jedi in these films. They took the force and turned it into something:

A) More powerful than it needed to be

B) A super power as opposed to a carefully crafted and mastered Martial Art.

 

Look at the Jedi in the original trilogy: Obi-Wan, Yoda and Luke. Now compare their personalities, mannerisms and habits to the ones in the new trilogy. They are quiet, reserved and calculating. They do not act without thinking (once they are masters that is). They always know exactly what is going on, their battles are more technique based without the freakin’ hopping around like fleas on cocaine. They aren’t arrogant and pompous rather they are wise and think before they speak. They are in control of any situation they are in as opposed to being swept up by the moment. This is as opposed to keeping their thoughts focused on “where they are, what they are doing,” to paraphrase Yoda. Keeping their thoughts focused on the moment is different from being swept up BY the moment. The Jedi in the Trilogy of Rear End (TOA if you will) are constantly swept up by the moment as they seem to be regularly losing control.

 

8) Time frame all out of wack: Explain this to me, please. How does it take 19 years to finish the Death Star that looked well underway in EPIII and yet it takes almost no time at all to have a “Fully armed and operational,” one in Jedi?

 

9) Temper Tantrum Vader: “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” That is all.

 

10) Clones: Okay yes it is a great Deus Ex Machina for tons of soldiers in a hurry who are already trained, but it completely takes the humanity out of the conflict. Clones vs. Droids, can we make it ANYMORE sterile? One of the reasons I am against completely automating conflicts is that it takes the humanity out of it, it makes the sacrifices meaningless. This whole conflict was meaningless!!! They could have swept up the Republic in patriotic fervor, not dissimilar from how we did in WWI and WWII. I am surprised Lucas didn’t think of that, considering, you know, how he based his dogfights off of WWII dogfights as opposed to real physics.

 

That would also have served to unify the populace and made the conversion to Empire look like it was something that was done from the bottom up as opposed to the top down. The unswerving loyalty of an army that CHOSE to fight as opposed to was BRED to fight makes a world of difference in public opinion.

 

This also could have served to show the people of the Republic being turned against the Jedi as they could be shown to be traitors to the Republic and you see the tortured decisions of the commanders and their troops in following orders to kill the Jedi. You know, the HUMAN element which was sadly lacking in this film.

 

11) Certain other stupid things-

A) Turbo lasers that eject spent shells. EPIII, Battle of Coruscant

B) General Grievous’ organ parts not freezing, or his lungs undergoing explosive decompression when he blows the transparisteel viewscreen; OUTSIDE an atmosphere.

C) Gungans

D) Stick Figures with Guns

E) Childish sounding names

F) Nothing looks imposing, if I saw half of what was coming at me on those battlefields I would likely be dead before they got to me, on account of laughter. An AT-AT would make me poo my pants.

G) Pod Race= Space Nascar, just more multi-racial.

H) Darth Maul, sorry folks the only reason most people think he is cool is because he didn’t get enough lines to screw up the character. He also killed the only character worth caring about in EPI.

I) Jango Fett, yes folks the man who has Boba Fett as his favorite character speaks out against Jango Fett. Why? Because it is a RETARDED FREAKIN’ ORIGIN!!!!

K) Kamino, a planet full of a bunch of aliens who speak slower than someone with a head injury and necks so small you could decapitate them with a small pocket knife.

 

 

12) Music: Yes I know John Williams did the music for all of the films but I still can’t help but feel that much of it was phoned in for the new ones. The music in the original trilogy evokes emotion from you and helps pull you into the film and the scenes. Duel of Fates sounded great, but it doesn’t really invest you in what is going on, it doesn’t ADD to the scene it just kinda fits the scene. The music in the original trilogy was important enough to evoke an emotional response, and really suit every minor detail. All I have to say is watch the battle on the Death Star between Luke and Vader in Jedi and you will know what I mean.

 

13) Characters: I can’t say enough about having characters you care about. After meeting Luke, Leia, Han, C3PO and R2-D2 in the originals you cared about them. After three movies I STILL didn’t care about the new Obi-Wan, Anakin, Padme, Shaft Windu, any Jedi and that about covers all the main characters. That is pretty sad when those are the only characters worth mentioning from the new Trilogy. In the original trilogy I left off characters like Lando, Obi-Wan, Yoda, Wedge Antilles, Vader and the Emperor. Some of these overlap, yes, however I feel they need to be judged as separate entities as they are by no means similar at all between films. Especially considering after three movies the ones in the new trilogy were not as developed as all the others were after ONE film.

 

I know I said it before, but I didn’t care about the deaths of ANY characters in any of the battles in EPI-III. When watching the original trilogy I cared about the characters. You want Biggs to evade Vader and his wingmen. You want to see Red Leader survive Yavin, you care about Wedge. You sense the desperation of the attacks on both Death Stars and the Battle of Hoth. The Imperials are imposing and implacable, dedicated and stoic. THEY have a human element to them as well. GOODNESS!! On the Death Star you hear idle chatter between soldiers left to guard a causeway, my goodness they are individuals, and their conversation doesn’t end with “Roger Roger.”

 

You are somewhat sad when the A-Wing pilot is forced into a suicidal dive at the Executor’s bridge at the Battle of Endor. You see the people in their fighters; you know their faces and their voices even if you do not know their names. You see the overwhelming odds of the Imperial Fleet. You see the unstoppable AT-AT’s shrugging off the greatest of Rebel firepower and keep on coming unabated. You sympathize with the troopers on the ground who are fighting a delaying action, sacrificing themselves so that others can get away. Again THE HUMAN ELEMENT!!!

 

I felt more emotion in watching the battle in the Battlestar Galactica mini-series outside of Ragnar Station while the Galactica held off two Basestars to let the civilian ships escape to safety. I felt more emotion in watching the Battle of the Line from Babylon 5: In the Beginning. A FREAKING MADE FOR TV MOVIE WITH TOTAL CG SPECIAL EFFECTS. I cared more about the Alliance soldiers in Serenity fighting for their lives against the Reavers.

 

Nothing about the new movies made me care about any of the characters. I was legitimately happy when all the Jedi died, they were pretty stupid to begin with, and their deaths merely ended an era of idiocy. When Padme died, I was happy for her, it meant she was out of the film. I cheered when Shaft Windu died. In all of the new trilogy, the only character whose death I regretted was that of Qui-Gonn. He was the only Jedi who came close to the mold.

 

________________________________________________________________________

This is but a portion of what could be ranted about in regards to Star Wars, needless to say the new films have poisoned the original. Their infectious plague has spread to the point that they put Hayden Christenson in the line up at the end of Jedi, changed the Emperor in Empire and changed the voice of Boba Fett. Greedo shooting first, the Sarlacc with a beak and so on also fall into this category despite not being directly related to EPI-III.

 

On account of all of this, I now have a hard time enjoying the unsullied Trilogy, the one without the revisionist editing of George Lucas. This is truly sad, this shows just how terribly the new films were in that despite their obvious lack of quality and no reason they should be connected with the originals, their stink and foul nature have sullied that which was brilliant. A sad state of affairs. May the force be with us all.

 

Except for George Lucas.