Domestic Violence In 2018

[True blue (and gold)]

Why would you assume Rice is “probably an alright guy?”

I thought that he was an alright guy before he punched his wife in the elevator. I tend to assume the best in people until they prove me wrong. Before this incident, he did a great deal of work with youth in Baltimore. He did seem like a good guy.

[ColonelPops]

I thought that he was an alright guy before he punched his wife in the elevator. I tend to assume the best in people until they prove me wrong. Before this incident, he did a great deal of work with youth in Baltimore. He did seem like a good guy.

 

I assume they are until they prove they are they aren’t. Certain actions keep you on the bad list. Ray is on that list.

 

My question was why after seeing video might we assume Ray is still probably an alright guy ?

[True blue (and gold)]

I assume they are until they prove they are they aren’t. Certain actions keep you on the bad list. Ray is on that list.

 

My question was why after seeing video might we assume Ray is still probably an alright guy ?

I misread the original post. I thought that he said "was" an alright guy. I do believe in the possibility of redemption, but that has to be demonstrated. That's hard to do with celebrities and sports figures once they are out of the spotlight.

[ColonelPops]

"Yeah we all agree rape is bad but I wonder what the female did that made him rape her."

[nkuclubbaseball19]

"Yeah we all agree rape is bad but I wonder what the female did that made him rape her."

 

This is the same thought that popped into my head while reading this thread.

 

The whole argument sounds like “yeah Ray raping Sally was wrong but what was Sally wearing? Did she buy Ray a drink and therefore Ray thought it was okay?”

[Beechwoodfan]

I thought that he was an alright guy before he punched his wife in the elevator. I tend to assume the best in people until they prove me wrong. Before this incident, he did a great deal of work with youth in Baltimore. He did seem like a good guy.

 

A lot of abusers are what my mom called “street angels house devils.” She used that terms a few times when I was growing up. I didn’t fully understand what house devil meant until I grew up.

[capt278]

I listen to DV cases every week. I have for six years. Not everyone is a crappy person. Sometimes people, both men and women, make a crappy decision. There are those that are the serial abusers. There are those that just made a very bad decision in the heat of the moment. Doesn't make them a crappy person, just means they screwed up royally.

 

Let me be clear, it is never OK to put your hands on another person in a relationship. Be it man or woman unless you are defending yourself from an attack by the other person.

[TheDeuce]

I listen to DV cases every week. I have for six years. Not everyone is a crappy person. Sometimes people, both men and women, make a crappy decision. There are those that are the serial abusers. There are those that just made a very bad decision in the heat of the moment. Doesn't make them a crappy person, just means they screwed up royally.

 

Let me be clear, it is never OK to put your hands on another person in a relationship. Be it man or woman unless you are defending yourself from an attack by the other person.

 

In your experience, are the majority of domestic abusers the one-time type offenders, or the ones who have shown a pattern of abuse?

[capt278]

Most of what I have seen are one time offenders. We have had a few repeat offenders but they are the exception instead of the norm.

 

Now I'm not saying the one time offenders are the cream of the crop. Odd thing I find in KY law, DV is a civil matter. It only becomes a criminal matter if assault charges are filed. Often, assault charges are not filed for whatever reason. Granted, if the police are called and they make an arrest, assault charges are filed. From my experience, most EPO's are filed by the victim after the fact, hence it is a civil matter unless the victim seeks to file a criminal complaint.

 

To me it is odd that a judge can find that an act of domestic violence occurred and a person does not face jail time. I don't know if it is different in other states. Maybe some of our attorney's can answer that question. I for one would be interested in that answer.