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UL Football jokes

Featured Replies

Why don't alot of UL players leave for the NFL draft before their senior year?

 

They can't afford the pay cut.

Like Ram, I have absolutely nothing against the 'ville, but in the spirit of the thread...

 

 

Coach Kragthorpe comes into the locker room before practice and says to his star receiver, "You’re failing math. If you don’t want to become academically ineligible you’ll have to answer these math questions correctly." The star receiver agrees and Coach K asks him "What does 4 plus 4 equal?

"Eleven” says the athlete. The rest of the team pleads, “give him another chance! give him another chance!”

Kragthorpe then asks, "What does 2 plus 2 equal?" and the receiver says "Four".

 

The rest of the team yells give him another chance! give him another chance!”

Like Ram, I have absolutely nothing against the 'ville, but in the spirit of the thread...

 

 

Coach Kragthorpe comes into the locker room before practice and says to his star receiver, "You’re failing math. If you don’t want to become academically ineligible you’ll have to answer these math questions correctly." The star receiver agrees and Coach K asks him "What does 4 plus 4 equal?

"Eleven” says the athlete. The rest of the team pleads, “give him another chance! give him another chance!”

Kragthorpe then asks, "What does 2 plus 2 equal?" and the receiver says "Four".

 

The rest of the team yells give him another chance! give him another chance!”

 

:lol:

A lady in Louisville calls 911. hysterically, she says,"someone has just broken into my house and I think he's going to rob me" The police officer says, "we are really busy at the moment, just get his jersey number and we'll get back to you".

 

Q.- four UL players in a car, who's driving?

A.- the police

 

Q.- what do you call a drug ring in Louisville?

A.- a huddle

 

Q.- did you know the UL team has adopted a new honor system?

A.- yes your honor, no your honor

 

The Cards are expecting to go 7-5 this season.

7-arrests, 5-convictions.

 

 

As a proud Cardinal fan, I have to say those are some good ones. :laugh:

Like Ram, I have absolutely nothing against the 'ville, but in the spirit of the thread...

 

 

Coach Kragthorpe comes into the locker room before practice and says to his star receiver, "You’re failing math. If you don’t want to become academically ineligible you’ll have to answer these math questions correctly." The star receiver agrees and Coach K asks him "What does 4 plus 4 equal?

"Eleven” says the athlete. The rest of the team pleads, “give him another chance! give him another chance!”

Kragthorpe then asks, "What does 2 plus 2 equal?" and the receiver says "Four".

 

The rest of the team yells give him another chance! give him another chance!”

 

 

Thats fantastic.:lol:

Q.- why can't most UL players get into a huddle on the field?

A.- it's a parole violation to associate with known felons.

 

Q.- how will the Cards spend the first week on fall camp?

A.- studying their Miranda rights.

:lol:

What do you say to a UL football player in a 3 piece suit?

 

Will the Defendant Please rise!

:lol:

Why don't alot of UL players leave for the NFL draft before their senior year?

 

They can't afford the pay cut.

:lol: Should that really be the case, they sure aren't getting much return for thier investment. The U.L. AD should sue the players for breach of contract.:D

Like Ram, I have absolutely nothing against the 'ville, but in the spirit of the thread...

 

 

Coach Kragthorpe comes into the locker room before practice and says to his star receiver, "You’re failing math. If you don’t want to become academically ineligible you’ll have to answer these math questions correctly." The star receiver agrees and Coach K asks him "What does 4 plus 4 equal?

"Eleven” says the athlete. The rest of the team pleads, “give him another chance! give him another chance!”

Kragthorpe then asks, "What does 2 plus 2 equal?" and the receiver says "Four".

 

The rest of the team yells give him another chance! give him another chance!”

:laugh::laugh: This one is great.

 

 

O.K., I'll throw in another one.... Q: What is the most popular CD of the U.L. players?

A: Hooked on Phonics

 

All of these are good and could be substituted to fit any school.

While not a UL joke, I found this to be quite funny. It's from a colllege football blog. I'll refraim from linking due to the periodic inclusion of a few of Carlin's seven words on the site.

 

It was in a discussion of UK's upcoming season.

 

[Our beloved Cats have suffered 23 consecutive defeats at the hands of the orange-clad inbreds from the south and it seems like each year they get closer and closer to breaking through. After a two-point loss in four overtimes last year, Kentucky can’t snatch defeat from jaws of victory again, can they? Either way, these games are usually close and passionate because of Senior Day, if nothing else. This year it will be at Tennessee, which means the players who haven’t been arrested yet will be honored.

How come this thread died?

 

Q.- four UL players in a car and Curtis Pulley, who's driving?

A.- the police

 

It didn't die:lol:

Q.- three UL players in a car, Curtis Pulley, and Will Fidler who's driving?

A.- the police

 

It didn't die:lol:

I took the liberty to update it for you.:thumb:

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