Dear Fellow Basketball Parents,

 

When I think about my son growing up, I think about him playing basketball. Since he could walk he has had a basketball in his hand. He would stand in the rain or blistering sun or sleet and even snow and practice refining his basketball skills. I would stand at the door and watch him. He would make up crazy plays, pretend that he was being guarded by Kobe Bryant and practice driving to the basketball goal. He would stand for hours trying to perfect his free throws, lifting weights, running sprints only to come back and stand there for however much longer it took him to get 30 free throws in a row without missing. My kid just loves the game of basketball. It is all he ever wanted to do with one goal in mind, "Some day I want to play basketball for Covington Catholic High School".

 

He isn't the fastest kid on the court or the most athletic. He doesn't have a perfect shot and he isn't 7 feet tall. He knows that he isn't going to play college basketball. But those things don't matter to him. Because he was raised to know that if he worked hard and put in the time...the blood...the sweat...(and there was a lot of both) and the tears....that some day he might get the chance to play basketball for CCH. This was his dream. To have the honor, of one day, going into his room before a big game, blaring his favorite song, packing up his gym bag, lacing up his shoes and putting on the blue and white jersey. To be able to run out of the locker room and warm up to loud music on the intercom he and his team mates meticulously selected during one of their practices (or maybe even in class). Of standing up tall and proud and praying with his coach and team. Of listening to the national anthem, and looking into the eyes of his proud family in the stands and smiling to one of his friends who was squeezed into the sea of Colonel Crazies. Of standing up, in line, as the starters are announced and doing a chest bump and slapping their hands. Of having the opportunity of one day playing a game of basketball for the Covington Catholic Colonels. His dream was simple really...to have the honor of being a part of a great CCH tradition and to have the opportunity to play on the Covington Catholic basketball team. To join a group of other young men, with the same drive and passion and together, to maybe, one day, if all the stars aligned, to have the honor of representing his school at Rupp Arena. That was his dream.

 

As a parent, all I wanted was to see him happy. If his happiness meant sending him to CCH so he could try to accomplish his goal of playing basketball and reaching his dream, well that was what I was going to do. I didn't question my decision at all...it was Covington Catholic after all. How could we go wrong? They have principles based on spirituality and use words like "mental and emotional growth" and focus on making the right decisions and preach that their coaching staff upholds these same values. I was putting my son in good hands. CCH was going to help me mold my son into a better individual and promote respect for others.

 

He made the basketball team. He did it! His hard work and effort had paid off. I still remember the day. How proud he was to be a part of this team. How excited he was to be a part of something so special....but that was just the beginning...and dreams don't always come true.

 

I've talked with many of you and have seen the sadness in your eyes and heard the pain in your voices as you talked about your son's experience of playing basketball at CCH. I know many of your sons had the same dream. I bet you felt like I did when you thought your son would become a better person for being part of this team. I bet you thought playing as a CCH Colonel would further promote the values you believe in? Things like being respectful to others, about having dignity...being fair and honest. Being part of this program would raise his self confidence level and give him skills to be a leader. I bet you thought that playing high school basketball for Covington Catholic would be some of your sons best high school memories.....

 

Sure, there have been some great memories and great friendships formed. There is the good stuff. But most of you that I talk to feel absolutely beaten down. Talks of transferring schools, getting releases, quitting. I feel your pain and I know that the pain you are feeling is real for your child.

 

We are confused and we don't know how to help our sons. We feel responsible for putting our sons in this situation and for being virtually powerless to change things. For some of us, it is hard to think that maybe we made the wrong decision by sending our sons to CCH or encouraging them to go out for the team. For others, maybe you are just sad that this experience hasn't turned out exactly as planned and maybe we are just sad because we know our sons will not have the fondest memories of playing CCH basketball.

 

There are many players, at this point in the seaons that are so full of resentment and anger and bitterness. Most of our sons, because they aren't permitted to express their concerns for fear of not getting the liquid gold of a minutes on the floor, suffer in silence. Those that do voice their concerns are viewed as mavericks, someone that is just trying to get attention, of pouting, of not paying attention of bringing the team down. The head coach says these trouble makers are "just upset about playing time", there "is nothing more to their frustration". But what if, just maybe, there is more to the story? What if the rumors we hear about it not being all about playing time are true? What if those who use their voice, are just trying to protect those who are too afraid to speak? Maybe the frustration you see in the kids eyes has everything to do about how the head coach makes them FEEL about themselves versus playing time. Maybe the inability to concentrate has something to do with the head coach playing mind games that they don't know what to expect from practice to practice or game to game. Maybe it is the way they FEEL that is translating to the losses on the court. Maybe the kids are mentally quitting on the team because they are so beaten down and tired. Just maybe this is the problem. Maybe we feel the coach has failed us and failed our sons...maybe we feel like this has gone on for far too long as we've watched our friends and neighbors sons give up their dream of playing basketball because dealing with the head coach "just isn't worth it". I know, for one, that the way I am feeling and the way my son is feeling has nothing to do about playing time and everything to do about him feeling "like he is not worth it" - not worth the effort, the patience, the time, the courtesy, the respect of his coach. Maybe that is why we are losing.

 

We all sit back in silence letting this happen. Why? Who are we afraid of?

 

Maybe it is time for us to get involved and start to plant the seeds to make a change. And, I know I'm not and that most of you still aren't giving up on this year's season. But, in order to turn it around we need to get involved now.

 

We have the responsibility to try to restore our sons self esteem to a level where they do feel like they are worth it. Maybe if each one of us takes time out this afternoon, and reminds our sons about their dream as a kid of just wanting to play basketball for CCH that we can help pick this team up. We remind these incredible young men in our lives, that they are special and powerful and talented and part of a great CCH tradition. We fill them with positive thoughts and remind them who they are as an individual, what their responsibility to their team is and tell them they are great! We implore them to forget the past and all the negatives that have them all clouded up and instead replace those thoughts with words of encouragement...we try to begin to repair and patch the holes that have been slowly burned into their being. We tell them that they have a choice. They can choose tonight how this dream can end. The season can be turned around tonight, the past images of self doubt that smoulder in their hearts and in their minds can be put to rest. That, together, as a team, they can move towards creating a very magical ending to their dream.

 

Please join me on my mission to right this ship today. Talk to your son and remind him about what is important. It isn't the crazy mind games or who is starting and who isn't, or what the coach did or said to who. Tell them to let it go for the rest of the season. Remind them that they, as individuals (not basketball players), are vital to your life and those of their family and friends. Remind them that this is just basketball and take them back to why they are here today. Tell them to remember why they wanted to be a CCH Colonel. Tell them to remember their dream.

 

If you believe in this message please forward.

 

If you believe there needs to be a change, please reach out to past players, parents and alumni and ask them to support our effort to make a change at the end of this season. Ask them to share their stories about how the head coach made them FEEL about themselves by the end of their basketball careers at CCH.

 

Send Bob Rowe and Mike Guidugli and the Board Members your concerns. If you look in the Student Handbook - page 23 begins Covington Catholics Athletic Philosophy policy. Ask yourself if the head coach is leading by example as you review Section B - The Objectives. We can begin to make a change....let your stories be heard.

[email protected] [email protected]

 

I'm doing this for my son - BECAUSE HE IS WORTH IT! I'm doing this for future Colonels - BECAUSE THEY ARE WORTH IT!

If you're going to do something like that, at least have the guts to put your name. If the son has an issue with the coach, he should be an adult about it, and voice his concerns in person. This just sounds like an upset parent who wanted to crab and complain. Will accomplish nothing IMO.

Would this have happened if unkown player was playing more and CCH was winning like it used to? I would like to say no it would not.

I would love to know what these " Crazy mind games" are? Why doesn't she/he use any examples to express what exactly he/she is talking about? Kinda sounds like a kid that doesn't get playing time and is upset that the coach is to hard on him or his teammates.

If you're going to do something like that, at least have the guts to put your name.

 

Amen.

Usually in my experience if someone goes out of their way to suggest their complaint isn't about playing time, it's about playing time.

Bump

Open comment to the author:

 

Take your ball and go home.

Kind of a long letter.

Winning cures everything. Well, most of the time it does.

 

Was it ever found out who wrote it?

Kind of a long letter.

 

No doubt. I read half of it and scrolled down the rest like it was an agreement you click 'accept' to.

No doubt. I read half of it and scrolled down the rest like it was an agreement you click 'accept' to.

 

That's funny.

When I grew up, I had a dream of marrying Daisy Duke. I worked hard to make sure my chores were done by 7pm on Friday nights. But as I grew older, I realize that this wasn't going to happen.

 

I dont remember sending a bunch of people a letter asking people to pressure Daisy into marrying me. I also didnt send a letter requesting them to bombard CBS with letters forcing her ouster because she didn't marry me. Her acting maybe.

 

What's next for these players? The parents don't feel like they got a fair shake on a job interview so they proceed to send e-mails to the corporate heads requesting the job interviewer's ouster?

 

Their kid gets a speeding ticket so they show up in court on their kid's behalf to argue the fairness of the ticket?

 

A girl dumps their son so they send e-mails to her parents and aunts and uncles asking that she be punished?

 

Parents will be the ruination of high school sports. They are already on their way. At some point, you have to quit trying to fight all of their battles or they will never be self-relient adults.

Winning cures everything. Well, most of the time it does.

 

Was it ever found out who wrote it?

 

You serious? You're not from around here are ya! There were plenty of hints throughout the email. All will deny but it really doesn't matter. Lets just say all's well in PHs.

Edited March 1, 201115 yr by tdyballgame
Deleted the "M"

What happened to kids accepting their roles on the team? Some kids are the stars, other kids get the stars ready in practice. That's life.