I've been coaching youth sports for the last decade and - as has been said above - this scenario is becoming all too familiar. It's disgusting really.

 

My suggestion...get the boy out of there and onto another team. There are still teams out there he could get on. There's simply no reason to subject a child to the psychosis of a YOUTH coach. It's damaging...and while I understand the concern the boy might not want to play anywhere else...I'd take the chance simply bc you're probably headed that way anyway with enough abuse from the coach.

 

Kids are resilient. He'll be fine. Remove him. Find another team and keep your fingers crossed you find the right non-psychotic coach who will re-energize the boys love for baseball.

 

I'm so sick of hearing and seeing this. It's shocking how unbelievably cruel and dismissive some grown men - and women - can be towards children. My favorite excuses:

 

- it wasn't personal

- I'm trying to make him a better person

- this is the way I was taught get over it

- kids need to be tough

 

You can instill discipline, be firm and demanding..without being abusive. If you can't find the right side of that line and stay on it...you shouldn't be coaching.

 

This is a high school senior

Edited March 6, 20188 yr by True blue (and gold)

This is a high school senior

 

Ok. Lol. Disregard. I read it as a young boy.

 

How odd...sounds like quite a narcissist.

Ok. Lol. Disregard. I read it as a young boy.

 

How odd...sounds like quite a narcissist.

 

No harm no foul here. This coach has a bridge to burn with someone in that family

One thing I would NOT do is post it on the board like this. You've narrowed it down to only a handful of players so... plus you've heard on the kid/parents' side. Not sure what good can come of this.

My daughters coach changed her Senior year in softball. The new guy tried every way to play someone else in front of her early in the season. He relented but rode her miserably. She ignored it and was supported by her team mates.

 

Good thing he kept her. She was one of the reasons they won the conference title and almost made the Final Four in vhsl.

Sounds like HS sports to me

There has to be something else to this story. Either the kid really is not as good as his parents say he is or the coach did not exactly say the things he allegedly said.

 

I believe coaches care about winning games and doing whatever they think gives them the best chance to win games. People talk about politics and coaches having favorites but I do not by into that.

 

I have known more coaches then the average person over the course of my career and I have never met one that would sacrifice a "W" in order to please a parent.

 

I also do not know any coaches that "hate" student athletes. I have been accused of not liking players before because they were not starting or playing much. I've been a teacher for 13 years and a coach for 15 years. I do not think I would have lasted this long if I did not like kids.

I think we all know some parents perspective can be way way way way off at times. I see it every day. So without some perspective of my own, it's hard to say because there just seems to be too many questions here. Taking it at face value the coach sounds like a phyco...but I highly doubt that's the case. Something just doesn't compute here.

Coaches don’t get paid much, so “power” is part of the gig for some of them. This guy is taking it to far if all the above stuff is true.

Most every coach I know likes to win. They "tend" to play the kids that give them the best chance to win. Although there are certainly coaches that might have an agenda against a kid or a parent, I think more often than not it is more a difference of opinion between the coach and parent about how much contribution towards winning a kid really makes. There are far more crazy parents than coaches in my experience. :jump:

I spoke with the father again last night and shared some of the insight here.

 

He is going to work with his son to talk one-on-one with the coach again but this time speak up about how things are going - share how he played past years and what he sees is going on now.

 

We will see how things shake from there. That may be the true indicator of where things really are at.

If #2 and #3 are seriously true, this coach needs to be named IMO. The guy has no business being involved in coaching at any level.

Couple of questions that I would like to know.

 

1. Is said coach a "dad" coach?

 

2. Has this coach been a high school coach before?

 

3. Has this coach been connected to a little league team and is "moving" up with them?

There has to be something else to this story. Either the kid really is not as good as his parents say he is or the coach did not exactly say the things he allegedly said.

 

I believe coaches care about winning games and doing whatever they think gives them the best chance to win games. People talk about politics and coaches having favorites but I do not by into that.

 

I have known more coaches then the average person over the course of my career and I have never met one that would sacrifice a "W" in order to please a parent.

 

I also do not know any coaches that "hate" student athletes. I have been accused of not liking players before because they were not starting or playing much. I've been a teacher for 13 years and a coach for 15 years. I do not think I would have lasted this long if I did not like kids.

 

The something else in this story, that you're not getting, is this coach truly hates this young man or someone in the family. I believe the young man's story, because fellow players would not be telling Cooper Dad #5 how bad it is for the young man in practice. You may not buy into it but there are coaches out there who are not interested in winning with another coach's players, because HE cannot take credit for their training and talent. It is an ego thing. I've seen coaches play every player they have, at a particular position, except the athlete who has put in a lot of their personal time at practice and camps and money but was trained by the OTHER coach. I have several coaches in my family and have heard instances like this one. There are psycho egotistical coaches out there who do, just for some reason personality conflict or family connection, develop hate for a young player. It's a shame that this young man has to live with this situation because at this age high school is the greatest thing in their life. This type of abuse that can become an emotional danger to the young person. I believe the young man. If meetings are not agreed to or a discussion between player, parents and coach with assistant coaches cannot be held, THIS COACH SHOULD BE NAMED. It may not help this young man but it may keep this guy from ever coaching anyone's child.

I’m not in favor of name dropping unless the allegations can be verified. It’s not that I have any reason to believe cooperdad isn’t telling the truth, but these are pretty serious allegations that need to be investigated further before namedropping IMO.