I preached this morning on the 7th Commandment, "You shall not commit adultery." I made a statement without really doing any research and would like some feedback. I said "It doesn't matter if someone is a Christian or not. They could be a Muslim, Hindu, Atheist, Agnostic, or completely unchurched. It doesn't matter if someone even believes in the Bible or not. Everyone thinks that committing adultery is bad. Christian or non-Christian, everyone thinks that you should not commit adultery. You should not do that to your spouse."

 

Do you think that is accurate? Is this kind of a universal truth?

I feel as long as someone has a conscience, they know it's the wrong thing to do.

I agree @PP1, yes indeed it’s bad. If two people are truly in love, they’d have no desire to go outside of their union. If they do, it’s one of the most hurtful things that someone can do to their loved one as their union is one of the most precious and important secure feelings in life, and to disrupt that security is to chance destroying what could and should be Heaven on earth for a couple. 

If couples ever begin to lose their conscience, and think it’s alright to play outside of their union, or “spice things up” they’re IMO being selfish, jeopardizing the sanctity of their union, and generally making it a relationship of convenience rather than unconditional love. 

And if that doesn’t describe it enough, there’s very few things in life that feel as awful as being cheated on. It can cause so much inner strife and depression that no one should have to endure.  

And I also agree that no matter your religion, or lack thereof it’s an awful thing to do. 

I think that adultery happens.  I don't think it is planned, nor is the offender out looking for it.  I believe that many people in the course of their daily living, are suddenly thrust into it and find themselves in this state, often regretfully.  But once you cross the line, the deed has been done and you have to pay the consequences.  

On 8/30/2021 at 9:52 AM, Mustang said:

I think that adultery happens.  I don't think it is planned, nor is the offender out looking for it.  I believe that many people in the course of their daily living, are suddenly thrust into it and find themselves in this state, often regretfully.  But once you cross the line, the deed has been done and you have to pay the consequences.  

I do think there are people who end up committing adultery without that being their initial intent. But I would kind of liken that to a "crime of passion" (not that committing adultery is a crime.) But likewise, I think there have been people who get so angry, that suddenly they find themselves lashing out at someone with fatal results. They didn't "intend" to kill someone, but they did. As you said though, that doesn't erase the fact that they did do the deed, and that they are still responsible for their own actions and the consequences of them.

On 8/29/2021 at 7:46 PM, PP1 said:

I preached this morning on the 7th Commandment, "You shall not commit adultery." I made a statement without really doing any research and would like some feedback. I said "It doesn't matter if someone is a Christian or not. They could be a Muslim, Hindu, Atheist, Agnostic, or completely unchurched. It doesn't matter if someone even believes in the Bible or not. Everyone thinks that committing adultery is bad. Christian or non-Christian, everyone thinks that you should not commit adultery. You should not do that to your spouse."

 

Do you think that is accurate? Is this kind of a universal truth?

I think, by and large, it's kind of a universal truth, yes.

It's probably hard to state that it's completely universal when it comes to polygyny/polyandry and concubinage. Pre-modern Judaism was accepting of polygyny and concubinage, and several modern sects of Islam still accept polygyny.

Pre-Meiji Japan was completely accepting of concubinage, but the Meiji Civil Code did away with any recognition for the legal status of concubines when it came into effect around the turn of the 20th century. Japan is a kind of interesting in some ways if you look deeper. The vast majority of Japanese citizens claim Shinto as their personal faith, yet very few of them acknowledge that formally. Regardless, with the Shinto tradition being completely accepting concubines, there are many areas Japan where it's still not unheard of for men to keep concubines and for that to be considered completely socially acceptable.

I think a lot of couples are unhappy and for whatever reason(s) they don't want to get a divorce and then things happen.

On 8/30/2021 at 9:52 AM, Mustang said:

I think that adultery happens.  I don't think it is planned, nor is the offender out looking for it.  I believe that many people in the course of their daily living, are suddenly thrust into it and find themselves in this state, often regretfully.  But once you cross the line, the deed has been done and you have to pay the consequences.  

I have been around the block a time or two, and personally have been very lucky with Mr. BWF.  Though I agree that most don’t look to cheat, there is a reason that people give in to doing so.  Also, I personally know serial cheaters.  They are always looking for something better, and only feel bad when caught.   I know a guy who repeatedly cheated on 3 wives.  Who would marry a guy after that?  Somebody did because he was a successful doctor.   Life is very weird and interesting.

I was reading an article online and infidelity has become oddly acceptable in Europe, like 50% or more in many European countries.  While the rate was higher for men (obviously), the percentage of women who found it acceptable was still pretty high.

On 9/3/2021 at 10:43 PM, Beechwoodfan said:

I have been around the block a time or two, and personally have been very lucky with Mr. BWF.  Though I agree that most don’t look to cheat, there is a reason that people give in to doing so.  Also, I personally know serial cheaters.  They are always looking for something better, and only feel bad when caught.   I know a guy who repeatedly cheated on 3 wives.  Who would marry a guy after that?  Somebody did because he was a successful doctor.   Life is very weird and interesting.

12 minutes ago, Bert said:

I was reading an article online and infidelity has become oddly acceptable in Europe, like 50% or more in many European countries.  While the rate was higher for men (obviously), the percentage of women who found it acceptable was still pretty high.

I always have trouble wrapping my brain about differences in men and women when it comes to infidelity because the end result is it is one man and one woman (in most cases) that cheat together.  I assume there are more willing men which does make sense to me.  In short, I think most people are only as loyal as their options. 

The only solution is to...not cheat.  

1 minute ago, nkypete said:

The only solution is to...not cheat.  

Just say no!

I think that if someone isn’t being satisfied in their relationship or marriage, they should absolutely explore other options. 

22 hours ago, TheDeuce said:

I think that if someone isn’t being satisfied in their relationship or marriage, they should absolutely explore other options. 

Maybe, but too many younger folks are raised in the “ instant satisfaction, everything is disposable, ME generation” mentality.  Marriage takes work sometimes.  I am definitely not against divorce, but think too few people put in the work before they bail.