So @UKMustangFan, having admitted to having an addictive personality, is addicted to heroin, cocaine, meth etc., even though he hasn't ingested one ounce of it?

 

I think it's safe to say if I ever took one of those you mentioned, even knowing the risks, I'd be addicted to it.

I think it's safe to say if I ever took one of those you mentioned, even knowing the risks, I'd be addicted to it.

 

But you're not currently... That's my point.

@BirdBrain, thank you for sharing your story. As a dad, it breaks my heart. I'm so sorry. I walk a line between feeling where several do in terms of a more callous view of the situation, then knee-jerking back to thinking about their families that are left behind. Every situation is different. Some don't deserve our sympathy. Some do. Often times it is impossible to know which, so I try to err on the side of assuming they were good people who, unfortunately, at some point, went astray. Glad your young man is alive and doing better.

 

We have had our moments on certain issues, but you showed great strength, yet vulnerability, in sharing your son's story -- thanks for doing that. Provides great perspective to those that like to operate within very strict lines of black and white.

Maybe we haven't been on the same page...

 

I'm not saying people have a choice whether or not they have an addictive personality or addictive traits. Obviously they can't control that.

 

My point has been even with an addictive personality, they have to make that initial decision to try something new. Hence, opening themselves up to new addictions.

 

We agree....but I will make this analogy: I'm a big guy, I like to eat, lots of food...I love Big Mac's, I would eat one every day if I passed a McDonald's and probably weigh 500lbs...but I have self control. I'm not addicted to McDonald's, I'm just weak in my decision making.

 

Addiction is not really like that...it doesn't think about unintended consequences, obvious terminal outcomes or anyone or anything else other than feeding the dragon....

 

So where my choice to drive by a McDonald's may be tough for me, an addict not going to meet the dope man is not the same.

 

Extreme amounts of support and effort go into staying clean and sober for addicts....They will risk everything, to include their life, to fix the demon in their head....and it's never "fixed"...only quieted until the next fix is needed.

@BirdBrain, thank you for sharing your story. As a dad, it breaks my heart. I'm so sorry. I walk a line between feeling where several do in terms of a more callous view of the situation, then knee-jerking back to thinking about their families that are left behind. Every situation is different. Some don't deserve our sympathy. Some do. Often times it is impossible to know which, so I try to err on the side of assuming they were good people who, unfortunately, at some point, went astray. Glad your young man is alive and doing better.

 

We have had our moments on certain issues, but you showed great strength, yet vulnerability, in sharing your son's story -- thanks for doing that. Provides great perspective to those that like to operate within very strict lines of black and white.

 

Thank you.

 

Perspective is the key. I was trained and have worked in that arena for more years than I care to remember, but it is different when it comes home....because you have absolutely no control whatsoever in the outcome, regardless of what you know or what you have seen.

 

I would wish these issues on no one but unfortunately in the day and time we live in, the chances for it to impact any and all of us somehow is very real.

 

Read, educate, be aware, probe and most of all pray...

We agree....but I will make this analogy: I'm a big guy, I like to eat, lots of food...I love Big Mac's, I would eat one every day if I passed a McDonald's and probably weigh 500lbs...but I have self control. I'm not addicted to McDonald's, I'm just weak in my decision making.

 

Addiction is not really like that...it doesn't think about unintended consequences, obvious terminal outcomes or anyone or anything else other than feeding the dragon....

 

So where my choice to drive by a McDonald's may be tough for me, an addict not going to meet the dope man is not the same.

 

Extreme amounts of support and effort go into staying clean and sober for addicts....They will risk everything, to include their life, to fix the demon in their head....and it's never "fixed"...only quieted until the next fix is needed.

 

That all makes perfect sense.

 

But for me, there's still a decision being made that opens them up to these negative addictions. I feel like you're implying that it's not in fact their decision to try heroin, coke, meth etc., rather it's their addictive traits that are choosing what they are and aren't going to try? (Correct me if I'm wrong on that) I'm sorry, I just don't buy that.

Let me tell you a little story that refutes your opinion:

 

Young kid, maybe 15 or 16, playing high school football at a high level, hurts his back...it's severe enough that he never plays another down of football or even participates in another sport during high school. Multiple doctors, specialists in the field of back injuries, can't do anything for him for months and months except administer pain relief.....oxycontin to be specific...

 

Fast forward 6 - 8 months....one pill no longer kills the pain, or two, or 5 - 8 a day...so the teenager seeks more, and more, and more....until one day, he gets caught with more than 9 pills...(because in the state of Kentucky, more than 9 pills in your possession gets you a trafficking charge) and he's looking at 10 years in the state penitentiary for Trafficking in Controlled Substance.....and he's a senior in high school.

 

This is self-inflicted addiction....

 

This is the decision to start using....

 

This is how you get addicted in the first place....

 

I quit asking for sympathy for this situation many years ago and turned to God and my rock solid spouse to help me understand the "why" behind all this....it just is, and everyday you wake up, worry, shake it off and get on with your life the best you can....

 

I'm going to be attending a visitation and funeral for a young man this weekend that was addicted to heroin.....I have sympathy for his parents, because I understand, to some extent, what it's like to have those experiences.....

 

I was lucky, my son went to jail and isn't dead....

 

That story does happen. A similar story also gets used as an excuse.

 

I hate pain. It sucks. I had my first ACL surgery at age 16. Seperated shoulder 8 months later in a car wreck(that tree didn't budge but my shoulder did, picked bark out of it for weeks). I had 2 more ACL surgeries and another scope in two years time plus a torn labrum. High school was essentially a blur to me and I hardly took the pills I was prescribed.

 

I didn't like the way they made me feel. I hated it. With that said some folks start to embrace it or look for a reason to use it. IMO that's a conscious choice. I've been dealt some of the best pills you can get yet I never abused them. Hell I hated having to take them when I did.

 

I get what you're saying but IMO it's a choice. Addiction is real. It's a real choice to decide that drugs are you're life. I've never talked to an addict that didn't admit they were struggling with other issues and I practically talk to them for a living.

 

With all of that said. Do I approach them with the bold faced truth that I believe? No. I talk to them and try to help them search for another answer, one that's not going to put them on a steel slab. I just don't agree with the choices but I want the best for them. I want them to know its not permanent and that they can help themselves and that there are people that want to help them. Whether or not that sticks, it's their choice.

That all makes perfect sense.

 

But for me, there's still a decision being made that opens them up to these negative addictions. I feel like you're implying that it's not in fact their decision to try heroin, coke, meth etc., rather it's their addictive traits that are choosing what they are and aren't going to try? (Correct me if I'm wrong on that) I'm sorry, I just don't buy that.

 

I'm not going to try and put words into BB's mouth (he's speaking well enough for himself, as it is, in my opinion), but look at it this way. What you're saying is basically "nobody in their right mind" would do this, unless they wanted to. But, if you're addicted to pain meds (or alcohol for that matter), to me, you are no longer in your "right mind". You have already succumbed to addiction. As an addict, your body is telling your mind that you NEED this. Your mind's defenses as to what is right and wrong, what is true and what is false, is being bombarded from within. I think it's very easy to understand that people who are addicted to pain meds reach a point where either more pills are needed, or they need them more often. The next step is...I need something stronger. It's a very slippery slope.

I'm not going to try and put words into BB's mouth (he's speaking well enough for himself, as it is, in my opinion), but look at it this way. What you're saying is basically "nobody in their right mind" would do this, unless they wanted to. But, if you're addicted to pain meds (or alcohol for that matter), to me, you are no longer in your "right mind". You have already succumbed to addiction. As an addict, your body is telling your mind that you NEED this. Your mind's defenses as to what is right and wrong, what is true and what is false, is being bombarded from within. I think it's very easy to understand that people who are addicted to pain meds reach a point where either more pills are needed, or they need them more often. The next step is...I need something stronger. It's a very slippery slope.

 

I've already given a "pass" to those who are prescribed pain killers as to how they could be come addicted to those.

 

I'm talking about the initial use of illegal drugs. Even if pain pills are the gateway, they still choose to try a different drug. It's just hard for me to harbor sympathy for that.

 

If someone dives right into illegal drugs with no "legitimate" gateway, zero sympathy. None.

That all makes perfect sense.

 

But for me, there's still a decision being made that opens them up to these negative addictions. I feel like you're implying that it's not in fact their decision to try heroin, coke, meth etc., rather it's their addictive traits that are choosing what they are and aren't going to try? (Correct me if I'm wrong on that) I'm sorry, I just don't buy that.

 

No, it is always an individual's choice....but with each individual, the choice to not use may be a force so overwhelming that non-addicts cannot understand the "why"...and I think that's where you might be, and I can understand that position.

This stuff hit the Huntington/Ashland area a week or so ago. There were 28 overdoses in Huntington and two deaths over a 4 hour time period. It's scary that it made it into a much smaller metropolitan area before it hit the cinci area.

Addiction is not a choice. A person's chemical makeup determines addiction more than anything else.

How do you get addicted in the first place? You make the decision to start using. Addiction is self-inflicted, I have a hard time showing sympathy towards that.

 

This 1000 times.

I'll link an article from the LA Time's about what recently happened in Huntington. Scary stuff to be honest.

 

26 overdoses in just hours: A small West Virginia city faces its demons - LA Times

I have a tremendous amount of empathy to those predisposed to addictions. It's a scary personality and physical trait that was a roll of the gene dice. It is hard to sympathize with those that have been given every opportunity, I get it. However, empathy is most warranted. I also sympathize because because, come on, we were all young, most of us experimented. The addicts experimentation turns ugly where mine turned to doing stupid things. Did they decide to drink, yes, however, they had no clue they would become addicted.

 

People may rationalize all they want and show no sympathy. The ignorance will never wane in this arena because they were strong enough or more accurately don't carry the addictive gene.