Solanco’s Pearson leaves the sidelines after verbal jousts cross the line. Some football coaching colleagues agree the parent/coach dynamic is a growing issue

 

When this football season began in late August, Joe Pearson had no idea it would be his last as Solanco's head coach.

 

An uncomplimentary letter to the editor of this newspaper in October and what Pearson said was a verbal attack on his wife by fans in the stands at a Golden Mules game changed all of that.

 

"It wasn't the primary reason I resigned," Pearson said of the verbal attacks from fans. "It was 'the reason.'"

 

"Tougher and tougher every year," Cocalico's Dave Gingrich said, and it should be pointed out that this is not a problem just for football coaches or coaches in the L-L. More and more, the coaching/parent dynamic is shaping up as the real battle in high school sports.

 

"Coaches are a lot easier to get to these days," said Gingrich, citing social media and its anonymous pen names, along with parental pressure. "More attention is being put on coaches when all we're trying to do is teach kids."

 

All agreed that some outside the programs feel they have a right to try and influence the decisions coaches make: Who starts, who plays, how much they play, etc.

 

Said Manion, "I wish people on the outside would not interfere with what goes on inside the program."

 

Williams called it "a sense of entitlement." Parental involvement in some cases, he remarked, can be overbearing.

 

Read more: COLUMN: The real battle in high school sports is parents vs. coaches - Sports

Lots of interesting points, the full article is definitely worth reading.

This article makes me appreciate the relationships I have had with my son's coaches over the years. I always enjoyed helping the program in any nature whether it be keeping the book, running the clock, whatever. Partly because I enjoyed helping the program in any way possible but it also allows you to get away from the coaches in the stands and just enjoy the game for what it is. A game that our kids happen to play. Now that I have the opportunity to be an assistant coach on my son's middle school team and being able to participate in each practice and to watch the development of the entire team and to see and feel the chemistry of the team brings in an even newer perspective and even more respect for head coaches than what I previously had. I cannot imagine the stress that comes with being a head coach let alone having to deal with unruly parents.

Pros come from college who come from high schools (or clubs) who come from junior high...

 

This doesn't account for all the conflicts, but many parents have high motivation to see their kids get every chance to make the jump from one level to the next where, with even stopping at college, a high financial incentive exists. Right, wrong or otherwise, this drives parents to assure that their child gets every opportunity to excel and have opportunities for the next level. When the coach doesn't see it that way, conflict arises.

Luckily that's something I haven't had to put up with...very little anyway.

 

I had a 5th grader on my 5/6 team last year. He clearly had 3 players above him at his position, however, he got a LOT of playing time, and even played more in a lot of games than the kids who played over him because of lopsided scores, etc. We are playing in Lex one night, close game, we keep getting the lead and then giving it back. This particular kid doesn't play a lot this game, makes too many mistakes and didn't play well when he was in on this night. It's a 1-2 point game back and forth down the stretch, I don't put him in as it gets late in the 2nd half, keep my best players out on the floor to try and win the game. We have a kid foul out, I put another kid off the bench. Well, this 5th graders mom SCREAMS at me from across to floor to put her son in the game. Shocked me to start with as this stuff doesn't usually happen with us, and then really kinda ticked me off. The dad barely acknowledged my existence as we were leaving the gym. And yes we won on a last second shot. After the game I reflected and thought, if that's how it is all the time for some coaches, then I don't know that it would be worth putting up with that stuff all the time.

Pros come from college who come from high schools (or clubs) who come from junior high...

 

This doesn't account for all the conflicts, but many parents have high motivation to see their kids get every chance to make the jump from one level to the next where, with even stopping at college, a high financial incentive exists. Right, wrong or otherwise, this drives parents to assure that their child gets every opportunity to excel and have opportunities for the next level. When the coach doesn't see it that way, conflict arises.

 

Problem is...most coaches see it as it is in reality. Some parents live in la la land where their kid is the next great D-1 player and destined for the NBA, NFL, etc. Rarely is it the other way around.

Problem is...most coaches see it as it is in reality. Some parents live in la la land where their kid is the next great D-1 player and destined for the NBA, NFL, etc. Rarely is it the other way around.

 

Agreed, but the conflict is still there, at least for a while until reality sets in, which is usually later.

Agreed, but the conflict is still there, at least for a while until reality sets in, which is usually later.

 

Usually right around the time the tuition bills start coming in and they start wondering why they spent those tens of thousands of dollars each year on camps, gas, hotel rooms, food, apparel, equipment, tournaments and "exposure" that landed their kid that partial scholarship to be on the JV team at Campbellsville.

It's the way people are now.

 

Most parents look at their child as the next Tom Brady and look at themselves as Bill Belichick.

 

I was fortunate to have parents who loved to watch me play but understood their role as parents. I had to remind my dad only one time (after a loss) that he got paid to run heavy machinery, not to call plays or second guess the man who got paid to coach.

I don't need to read an article from Lancaster online to know this happens.

 

Look in our own N Ky back yard. This is no different than what happened to Brossart at CovCath, Spritzky at Dixie, Listerman at CovCath and what is currently happening to Warner at Ryle.

I don't need to read an article from Lancaster online to know this happens.

 

Look in our own N Ky back yard. This is no different than what happened to Brossart at CovCath, Spritzky at Dixie, Listerman at CovCath and what is currently happening to Warner at Ryle.

 

I have question and I am not being specific to any one coach or case.

 

Is it/this all bad? Or can you argue that social media gives the masses a voice that would otherwise be squashed by the school administration?

I have question and I am not being specific to any one coach or case.

 

Is it/this all bad? Or can you argue that social media gives the masses a voice that would otherwise be squashed by the school administration?

 

Yes it is bad!

Unless the parents sit in on every practice, see what the coaches see, understand the chemistry, understand the coaches philosophies, they should stay out of the coaches business. It should be up to the administration who does the hiring and firing of these coaches to better understand what is going on in the coaches minds. If a coach is that bad, shouldn't the ones that hire and fire him be held accountable as well? nobody ever blames the AD or principal for a bad hire. They always blame the coach.

Usually right around the time the tuition bills start coming in and they start wondering why they spent those tens of thousands of dollars each year on camps, gas, hotel rooms, food, apparel, equipment, tournaments and "exposure" that landed their kid that partial scholarship to be on the JV team at Campbellsville.

 

My kid is on the JV team at Campbellsville with no scholarships. :lol:

 

It's not any of his coaches fault though. Nobody's fault really. Just reality. We love it though. Game tonight!!!!!

I've coached and I've been on the sidelines questining coaches moves.

 

I knew when I coached that parents were always going to be the most difficult part of coaching, but to not let it get the best of you is the only way to be a succesful coach.

 

Being in the stands questioning coaching moves is natural. Every coach who watches games from the stands does the same thing. IT's when it gets personal then it crosses the line.

 

The only time I ever had a real problem with a parent was when I coached Soccer, it got so bad that I had to have the parent banned from the sidelines of the complex we played most of our games at. I was also backed by all the other parents which made it a lot easier. I felt bad for the parents kid, but he actually seemed to perform better without dad being there.

 

Coaches will always be second guessed. I am always the best coach there is when I'm sitting in the stands. When I was on the sidelines or in the dugout I always had 1 priority and that was the kids come first. I miss coaching but just don't have the time I used to have to dedicate to the sport I was coaching.

Watching youth football I have seen some crazy parents or should I say parents over react on coaches that volunteer their time to coach a group of kids for free.