I agree with the social media part creating heated feelings in the week leading up to the game. A game 5-6 years back is a prime example, although the players never came to blows. Team A has their own private Facebook page, a Team B player was living in a Team A player (home issues)and saw that team A players FB page and what was being said about Team B (some serious nasty things). Team B player obviously tells his boys and the two teams start going back And forth on social media. The coaches for both teams allegedly had no clue about this nor did the officials, Or ADs until pre-game that night. The officials got both HCs and an assistant together and discussed the situation and assured them they wouldn’t tolerate any funny stuff. The game itself was exciting but still very aggressive and the officials were right by the players after every play and the HCs to their credit were constantly talking to their players as well (no play off for any adult). 
 

It was a pretty packed house Considering the teams records, and there was a noticeable vibe in the air, almost a nasty vibe from the stands.

This is an example of how when adults do know of social media trash talk they can and absolutely should stop it right away and bench any player that goes ahead with any funny business.

On 11/4/2022 at 10:56 AM, theguru said:

I don't necessarily disagree with anything in your post but another way of looking at it is this has been an issue for decades and nothing is changing or improving and that is an indictment of the coaches/adults involved. 

I will agree with this. When dealing with this many kids/coaches/adults there will always be problems. Coaches do have to set the standard, that doesn’t always mean everyone will follow. Kids need good influences in their lives more than ever now! 

On 11/4/2022 at 12:04 PM, HedgeHog8 said:

I agree that this is a violent sport, and we expect players to play with raw emotion and combat opponents 1 on 1. It is hard to turn that fire off sometimes.

IMO, the problem is a societal problem, not coaching, community or program culture.

There used to be respect in the dogfight. At the end of a fight you could shake hands and turn around having more respect for standing up for yourself and doing your best on every play, likewise for your opponent. Now when there is a disagreement or conflict with any kind of opposition, the goal is to humiliate, belittle or claim an alternate narrative of how things really are. There is an impulse to make excuses, place blame and lash out in loss. There is the impulse to brag, put down and goad opponents in victory.

Tell me who else among us teaches grace in victory and grace in defeat other than our coaches. Where else is it learned and, more importantly, reinforced outside of sport in today's world?

Also, as an aside, Social media makes it worse because interactions are no longer limited to between the whistles, but in the week leading to the game and the ride home after.

This is what grace in victory looks like.  

This reminded me when one of my son’s played his last game ever.  A top QB from Highlands went up to him just like this.  He knew his opponent, who chased him all night, had just played his last game. Memorable, and I got the picture.

Let’s show more of these vids and less of the fists flying.

It is a lack of overall discipline that causes most of this... But perhaps another side of the coin to consider they are taking the violence out of the game at such a fast rate, these boys playing nowadays don't really get to unleash the aggression we used to in football. The old saying, all dressed up and nowhere to go... or in this case all fired up and not allowed to hit anyone. 

3 hours ago, FLYGUY said:

It is a lack of overall discipline that causes most of this... But perhaps another side of the coin to consider they are taking the violence out of the game at such a fast rate, these boys playing nowadays don't really get to unleash the aggression we used to in football. The old saying, all dressed up and nowhere to go... or in this case all fired up and not allowed to hit anyone. 

They are taking the unnecessary violence out of the game. There is still plenty of room and opportunities to be aggressive in football. The cheap shots, blind side hits, helmet to helmet collisions etc, don't need to be part of the game because the make the game unsafe, and shouldn't be part of the game anyway.

25 minutes ago, rjs4470 said:

They are taking the unnecessary violence out of the game. There is still plenty of room and opportunities to be aggressive in football. The cheap shots, blind side hits, helmet to helmet collisions etc, don't need to be part of the game because the make the game unsafe, and shouldn't be part of the game anyway.

Your probably misinterpreting my opinion somewhat.  But it’s really uptight these days. I think that adds to the overall frustration of players, and coaches. Most the teams you see In fights are struggling ones. So I think it is a part even if small.

 

8 minutes ago, FLYGUY said:

Your probably misinterpreting my opinion somewhat.  But it’s really uptight these days. I think that adds to the overall frustration of players, and coaches. Most the teams you see In fights are struggling ones. So I think it is a part even if small.

 

I would agree that teams that struggle are prone to fighting. But usually those teams are getting beat, and getting beat up. That's why they are struggling, not because they aren't "allowed" to be aggressive. Again, aggression isn't being taken out of the game...just the cheap, unnecessary stuff.

I don't see there being any more problems now than there used to be, just every fight is now posted to social media and video taped.

I would argue there is less fighting in games now than there was in the past.  

Fighting and football have always been intertwined...and in certain settings (Pre Season Camps and Practices) has been encouraged.

 

No Brawls or Ejections.... practicing the altercation

 

The 93 Greyhounds- these guys did a great job handling less than ideal circumstances.... and they could play!

As coaches prepare for the preseason, maybe consider practicing for the altercation. Sounds crazy, but we do it every preseason at the end of a July workout.

 

We simulate an opponent contacting our player and describe the type of verbal exchange our guys may encounter. We have two objectives:

1- protect our teammate.

2- no one gets a penalty or is ejected.

 

As soon as the altercation begins, our guys ON the field, grab our player that is involved in the altercation. We tell our kids to never touch a player from the other team.As a group, they surround him and physically bring our player to the sideline. The players on our sideline open up like the Red Sea, the guys on the field take our guy behind them, and the Red Sea closes back up.... the sooner we can get our guy out of the officials sight, the better. 

 

We tell our kids that they must be the one to remove our player. One night, protecting a player and trying to keep him from getting ejected/seen by the officials, one of my coaches quickly jerked a kid off the field. Even though our coach was helping the young man, it looked bad and the parents got upset. Since then, I have told our guys that I do  not want our coach put on the spot like that. They need to handle those situations. 

 

In 25 years, we have only had 4 ejections, and all 4 were unwarranted or handled poorly. I like how we handle it because it gives us a positive way to be a family and look out for each other without having to sacrifice a win or a kid missing out on two or more Friday nights of HS football. 

 

If a coach out there has a unique way to practice unusual circumstances or events, please send that to me at [email protected]. 

 

It has been my experience that most of my kids have been good guys that want to do what is right and please the coach. Giving them a plan for a tough situation has helped our guys be successful and prevented some ugly Friday nights.