BigVMan23 Posted July 14, 2016 Posted July 14, 2016 So, how many of you out there have this scenario? You have a really good friend who you hang with and do stuff together, but their spouse/significant other...uhhhhhhh, that's another story, can't stand them. And if so, does your friend know how you feel about their spouse/significant other?
Getslow Posted July 14, 2016 Posted July 14, 2016 It's awful. And there's no telling your friend you don't like the spouse. That'll go nowhere.
BigVMan23 Posted July 14, 2016 Author Posted July 14, 2016 It's awful. And there's no telling your friend you don't like the spouse. That'll go nowhere. Maybe you haven't told him...but...do you think he knows?
Getslow Posted July 14, 2016 Posted July 14, 2016 Maybe you haven't told him...but...do you think he knows? Well ultimately he saw the light as they're no longer married and I think he sees that he was sort of blinded to some of her less admirable qualities. But he never would've seen things that way while they were still together... or at least he'd never say so. My buddy's the kind of guy for whom that ring means exactly what he said it did as they stood at the altar and he'd have stayed miserable his whole life if she hadn't been the one to start the ending.
Bipsic Posted July 14, 2016 Posted July 14, 2016 Well ultimately he saw the light as they're no longer married and I think he sees that he was sort of blinded to some of her less admirable qualities. But he never would've seen things that way while they were still together... or at least he'd never say so. My buddy's the kind of guy for whom that ring means exactly what he said it did as they stood at the altar and he'd have stayed miserable his whole life if she hadn't been the one to start the ending. You just described one of my buddy's to a tee. He had just gotten married when we first met, so none of our mutual friends had a chance to warn him either directly or subtly before the mistake was made. He took the impending divorce rather hard and we all helped him through it, but thankfully we have the one blunt friend who finally broke the ice by telling him that he never liked his wife. When all of us agreed, he finally saw her flaws and the bashing ensued.
Jumper_Dad Posted July 14, 2016 Posted July 14, 2016 One of my two best friends broke up with a great girl he had dated for years and married a money grubbing another word for prostitute. I remember 2 or 3 of us standing outside of the church before the wedding begging him not to marry her. 2 years later he came home a couple of days early from a business trip and was given a tip to go to a local motel...knocked on the door and wife opened the door with sheet wrapped around her. I could not stand her from day 1, nor could any of our other friends...she was just a pain in the butt and very spoiled. Best friend growing up married a girl that never liked me and I NEVER liked her. They were married for close to 30 years and she left him out of the blue for a janitor at her job. Within a year of leaving him she married...the janitors brother.
75center Posted July 14, 2016 Posted July 14, 2016 I imagine many of us have that situation. It's hard all the way around.
theguru Posted July 14, 2016 Posted July 14, 2016 If they are a really good friend you should have an open dialogue with them. That doesn't mean bring it up often or harp on it but it does mean when your bestie is sharing with you, you should have some unique perspectives that he/she needs to consider with their significant other moving forward.
BigVMan23 Posted July 14, 2016 Author Posted July 14, 2016 Had a college buddy who was a few years younger than me...he got married pretty young. Wife was just an immature Wench...that's a capital W. Well he was all down one day, they had been arguing. He asked me about the situation. I told him to leave the girl. They had no kids, they didn't own anything, do it now and chalk this one up as a mistake. Of course he didn't listen, and not long after that she was pregnant. After she had the kid she did seem to mellow out a tad, even with some (supposed, according to her) PPD going on...or maybe that was just her natural personality still coming out, was hard to tell. I think she saw my buddy was maybe willing to dump her if she didn't try and change some, that living a life where you dread to even come home at night was not something he was looking forward to. Lost contact with them not long after I left school, and that's been a while now. Don't know if they are still together or not.
MJAlltheWay24 Posted July 14, 2016 Posted July 14, 2016 I tried really hard to think of one that I really didn't care for, but I couldn't. Guess I'm lucky in that aspect that I get along with all of their wives/significant others.
lawildcat Posted July 14, 2016 Posted July 14, 2016 I hated my best friend's husband from the moment I met him! He was a complete jerk. She eventually saw the light and divorced him! Celebrated her 9th anniversary just yesterday with husband #2. Now he's a keeper!
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