I think Hatz and rockmom have it pegged, that's how I would handle it if I were in you shoes. Though, I have to commend you for taking your obligations seriously. I know far too many people who would love to be in your shoes so they could manipulate both sides to inflate their own self-importance.

Thanks for saying that, Habib.

 

Person A is (hypothetically) someone who is very important to me. Person B is (hypothetically, of course) someone who used to be very important to Person A...and, I suspect, would like to be again. Oh, and neither are BGPers.

 

The plot thickens.

Thanks for saying that, Habib.

 

Person A is (hypothetically) someone who is very important to me. Person B is (hypothetically, of course) someone who used to be very important to Person A...and, I suspect, would like to be again. Oh, and neither are BGPers.

 

The plot thickens.

 

Tune in tomorrow when Birdsfan reveals that Person A was really the gunman on the Grassy Knoll.

Tune in tomorrow when Birdsfan reveals that Person A was really the gunman on the Grassy Knoll.

And responsible for 9-11.

Jesus, replied.."why are you searchng for the dead among the living"? So, ask the question back.."why are you asking me this?"

I have a hypothetical question, and would love to hear the thoughts of the greatest debaters on the planet, here on BGP. This really isn't political or religious, but I suspect it will be debated on moral grounds; so I'm asking it here. This is the question:

 

Suppose you have a close friend who has entrusted you with a piece of very sensitive information. Then, another friend somehow gets wind of it, or suspects it to be true. They come to you and ask you to confirm it. Do you lie to this friend, or betray the the trust of the first friend?

 

Also, I know this isn't a strictly "Christian" issue at all, but I would be interested to hear some of your thoughts on how it should be handled from a Biblical perspective.

 

This is what the 5th Amendment and the phrase "no comment" were designed for.

 

You do not have to lie or betray - just do not offer any information at all.

Saying "I can't comment" or "ask them yourself if you want to know" is another way of saying "Yes, it's true." Use the classic "Oh, I have no idea...". Proceed by changing the subject.

Edited April 8, 201115 yr by Blue Magic

Jesus, replied.."why are you searchng for the dead among the living"? So, ask the question back.."why are you asking me this?"

I was hoping you would reply. Thanks Larry.

Thanks for all the wise advice, everyone. :thumb:

 

Can I come back tomorrow? I have a lot more questions...and very few answers

I have a hypothetical question, and would love to hear the thoughts of the greatest debaters on the planet, here on BGP. This really isn't political or religious, but I suspect it will be debated on moral grounds; so I'm asking it here.

On behalf of all the master debaters on BGP, I have to agree with Mom, Hatz, Colonels, Habib, Larry, et. al.

 

Very sound advice... tougher to actually implement, especially if pressed by party B, but very wise advice. :thumb:

The only thing I might offer is this...give person A a heads up that word is getting out if it is that important. You may even tell him person b asked, but you didnt tell...

OK...serious now....

 

You don't betray the friend who told you something in confidence UNLESS it is information that is dangerous to the person who told it to you or others. Even then, you find the appropriate avenue to pursue, which likely isn't the 3rd party who's trying to verify the information.

 

I'd just say, "You know, Witchipoo, if I knew anything like you're suggesting, I wouldn't tell you. You know what you should do? You should ask HR Puffenstuff straight out. This constitutes gossip, and I don't participate in gossip."

 

RM nailed it.

I agree with RM and Hatz too, but Larry really nailed what I was going to post.

 

When somebody asks me something that I think they have no business asking me, I usually reply with "Why do you ask?" or "Why do you want to know?"

 

Their next response will tell you what their motive is and they will almost never repeat the question. When faced with admitting they are just nosing around where they don't belong, they will generally look at their feet, mumble something about hearing something and then bid you farewell as they go on their merry way.

 

On the occasion somebody has a legitimate reason for asking, they will have no problem looking you in the eye and explaining it.

Thanks again for all the wise advice. When I posed this question, it was in anticipation of facing the dilemma. Fortunately, it has yet to come up. Lord willing, it never will.

I would just tell them that "other people's busines is none of my business" and leave it at that. I think if you put the question back on Person A who confided in you that any logical person sitting in Person B's shoes would at least have suspicions that what they think is actually true by your non-denial. I like for all my friends to know that I can be trusted and am not a source of gossip. Having done that for 27 years I'm rarely in any situation like that.