June 23, 201511 yr I just returned from 2 back to back weekends of family weddings. Great fun, good times, joyous celebrations. I have been to 5 weddings for nieces and nephews in the past 2 years. I am fully aware of the expenses, as my siblings have shared such details with me during the planning processes. While I am no expert, here is my list of what's cool and what's not, from a guest's perspective. Cool --Assigned seating. It takes out the guess work for guests. Most people won't question or complain to bride and groom on their day. They will just take their seat during dinner and then can switch around later. --Buffets. My preference versus the meal pre-selection cards that you get with the invitation. If the meal you selected is not so great, you are out of options. With a buffet, you have options. And serving is quicker. Just make sure it's good food. So far the best wedding food was the lowest budget wedding held at a park and rec center hall, where they were able to choose their favorite restaurant to cater it. --Bride and Groom Cake cutting before the dinner is served, so they have a captive audience. Then cake can be sliced and served up for dessert right after dinner. --Gift bags at hotel rooms for out of town guests. Simple gesture with water bottles, granola bars, chocolate, chips, etc. Just a cool thing. (The lottery scratch-off in each bag was a nice touch, too.) --A big dance floor. Just make it happen! --Fun, interaction games/events sprinkled in that get all the guests involved. More on that later. Not so cool Unassigned seating= chaos Party favor gifts at each table. Expensive and you know the guests will forget them. The little name rings on the wine glasses. Waste of money and get left behind. Long toasts where everyone is crying.:no: A few tears here and there, ok. But this is suppose to be a happy occasion for crying out loud! An army of bridesmaids and groomsmen. Why? Pick the people that are closest to you now and you know will be close to you forever. You don't want to look back at your wedding pictures and explain to your kids who certain people are, because you have completely lost touch with them. Limited time open bar. Guests will stand in long lines during that entire time to get their beverages. Expensive for bride and groom and frustrating for guests. Just serve complimentary beer and wine and soft drinks to guests all night. Less expensive, shorter lines, and without the hard stuff, guests won't get so drunk. Agree or disagree? Let's hear it.
June 23, 201511 yr As an insider, I will say all of the above are spot on except the food. That's an "It depends" from a cost perspective to those who are paying. I understand guests want choices, but a venue like a hotel has to charge more for a buffet because they have to make sure that no item runs out, which means that some items will be over-prepared...which you pay for regardless. In a venue that allows outside caterers, you may be able control the price better, but it's still an "it depends". If you are paying, say, per item, ie a Steamship Round, 25 lbs Ceaser Salad, 50 lbs green beans, etc, then when the food runs out, it's out. If you're paying per person, you likely will be paying more because of the need to over-prepare. When I helped plan my son's reception, we chose a plated, with choices, and it was FANTASTIC. We had the meal selection in the invitation and all was so well organized by the staff, even the Vegan entrees were prepared beautifully. We knew our cost/pp which helped in determining how big of a wedding we could afford. And given that the guarantee didn't have to be in until 72 hours prior, we didn't pay for too many people that didn't show. We did full host bar for an hour prior, the host beer/wine with dinner, cash liquor, and full cash after dinner.
June 23, 201511 yr Maybe it's just me, but I will never, ever understood why people spend SOOOOOOO much money for a one night party. I guess so people have nothing better to do with 10K/20K. My wedding (20 yrs. ago) cost less than $2000 and that included Hall (beer & wine included), pictures, & food. My parents bought $1000 worth of booze to serve at the reception and father-in-law bought the cake. Best reception I was ever at, open bar and the food was nothing but appetizers....chicken fingers, wings, cheese sticks, veggie trays, potato skins, etc....
June 23, 201511 yr Assigned seating is a HUGE pain the butt for the couple but it does make things easier for the guests.
June 23, 201511 yr A couple things we did.... - I believe I got the idea from CWB on here actually, but when we sent invitations we included a card for married couples to put their first dance song on and singles to simply request a song. We played the 1st dance songs while they waited for the wedding party to arrive and throughout dinner. - Candy bar. It takes the place of the party favors and generally everyone enjoys getting some chocolate or something sweet. - Photo Booth. By far the best decision we made. The company we used brought a ton of props, the booth was big enough to fit 12 people, and we got an album with copies of everyone's photos that went in it. It was neat to look through the album and see everyone having fun and goofing off throughout the night.
June 23, 201511 yr All I ask is that you please refrain from playing "Rocky Top". 80's BIG HAIR was a staple at mine. :ylsuper:
June 23, 201511 yr Maybe it's just me, but I will never, ever understood why people spend SOOOOOOO much money for a one night party. I guess so people have nothing better to do with 10K/20K. My wedding (20 yrs. ago) cost less than $2000 and that included Hall (beer & wine included), pictures, & food. My parents bought $1000 worth of booze to serve at the reception and father-in-law bought the cake. Best reception I was ever at, open bar and the food was nothing but appetizers....chicken fingers, wings, cheese sticks, veggie trays, potato skins, etc.... There is virtually no way to keep it anywhere close to that low now days. Photographer and DJ alone are going to run you that much if not more, depending on the quality. Food is ridiculously expensive nowadays. We looked at about a dozen places. Cheapest place was around $25 a person.
June 23, 201511 yr There is virtually no way to keep it anywhere close to that low now days. Photographer and DJ alone are going to run you that much if not more, depending on the quality. Food is ridiculously expensive nowadays. We looked at about a dozen places. Cheapest place was around $25 a person. That's absurd!!!!! I love my Little Girl's, but that AIN'T happenin'. :no: Guess Mrs. Lawnboy will have a lot of cooking to do. :lol:
June 23, 201511 yr There is virtually no way to keep it anywhere close to that low now days. Photographer and DJ alone are going to run you that much if not more, depending on the quality. Food is ridiculously expensive nowadays. We looked at about a dozen places. Cheapest place was around $25 a person. Disagree on that, Wife and I did our wedding for Under $6000.
June 23, 201511 yr Attending a very large (by my standards anyway, something like 350 guests) on Saturday evening - one of my avatar's college roomies. I will try to let you know what's cool and what's not.:thumb:
June 23, 201511 yr Not cool: Expecting people who's wedding it is to conform to what others want. I don't like assigned seating though, you would figure adults can figure out how to make it work. Plus, don't make me sit next to someone I don't like, unless that seat is the closest to the bar
June 23, 201511 yr Hoops, I have to agree with everything you said. I will add, that a few of the weddings that I went to had too many toasts (and some too long as you stated). I went to a wedding recently, where we sat in our chairs, watched the introduction of each member of the wedding party, then the speeches. I think we sat for over an hour. Dinner wasnt served until after 10. That is late for us old folks. I also do not understand the elaborate bachelor/bachelorette destination parties. Weddings are expensive enough without spending hundreds of dollars going of town. Personally, I miss the old church basement weddings with the lunchmeat buffets. They were so much more fun.
June 23, 201511 yr All I ask is that you please refrain from playing "Rocky Top". We can also do away with
June 23, 201511 yr Disagree on that, Wife and I did our wedding for Under $6000. You had photographer, flowers, tuxes, cake, food, drinks, DJ, and a venue for under $6000? How many guests?
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