So next Friday & Saturday I'll be down in Louisville for my brother's wedding and I have to give a toast. I've got all the basic "happy for you guys" etc, down, but am in need of adding a bit to it in the form of jokes, stories, etc.

 

Anyone got any ideas/suggestions?

It's nice to mix in a short funny story but you have to make sure it's funny to everyone not just you and him. Less is more in a best man toast IMO.

Try not to mention anything about the hookers in Vegas!

Less is more in a best man toast IMO.

 

Absolutely agree. It takes a particular talent to hold a room like that for more than a couple minutes. Keep it simple.

Gave my first Best Man's Speech over the summer and I thought it went great. A little pressure but there's a really good chance that yours will be better than the Maid/Matron of Honor because they will cry, make it too personal, (saw one sing a song...I still shake my head), or go way to long.

 

Say something about the Bride!

Heard a joke once that closed out the speech (not that I recommend this one) but it was: May all your ups and downs be between the sheets!

Absolutely agree. It takes a particular talent to hold a room like that for more than a couple minutes. Keep it simple.

 

Agreed.

 

I was my younger brother's best man, and he had a fall wedding, so for my speech, I gave my sister-in-law a short list of "suggestions for Christmas gifts" to get him for their first Christmas together as a married couple - each gift idea pertained to a funny story about my brother or strange personality trait that he has. It was good for a few laughs.

A few other things:

1) Thank everyone for coming to the wedding at the beginning of your speech.

2) If you know who's paying for the wedding and/or reception, thank them at the beginning too.

3) Say something nice about the bride. Tell her she looks great, but say something else nice as well - and make the compliment genuine and honest.

4) Jokes in speeches are a little tricky. Inside jokes should be left out, regardless of how funny they may seem...even if there are a handful of people in the know. I read my speech to a couple of folks at work who didn't know my brother and asked them if they thought it was funny, and as a result I ended up cutting out a couple of jokes that probably wouldn't have gone over too well.

5) Try to close with a simple statement rather than waxing poetic. It comes off far more sincere if you do it that way. And if you're going close with a formal toast that you find somewhere, do your best to have it memorized rather than reading it word for word.

^So you're saying a "mic drop and walk away" isn't the appropriate way to end?

 

Seriously though, thanks for the advice.

I've been to a couple now where you say your congratulations then acknowledge how your brother has gotten around a lot in his day and that you will need back all the keys from his previous flings. Random girls start to bring up keys, bridesmaids, the bride's mother, a male friend, etc.

I've been to a couple now where you say your congratulations then acknowledge how your brother has gotten around a lot in his day and that you will need back all the keys from his previous flings. Random girls start to bring up keys, bridesmaids, the bride's mother, a male friend, etc.

 

That would be pretty funny...although it would kind of depend on the crowd. I think it would be hilarious, but I've got a good number of relatives who would NOT appreciate that at all. Kind of on a related note, I went to a wedding once where the best man was the groom's younger brother, and his entire speech was about how, "yeah, getting married to a girl might make you think the groom isn't gay, but I'm not really convinced". It was HILARIOUS...but I think I was one of only a dozen people who thought it was funny at all. Ended up being pretty awkward as a result.

Try to relate a story from your childhood that paints your brother in a positive light. And I agree, with the others that you need to compliment the bride -- on something other than how she looks. Depending on the people involved, it may also be nice to work a relevant quotation or verse from the Bible into the toast.

So next Friday & Saturday I'll be down in Louisville for my brother's wedding and I have to give a toast. I've got all the basic "happy for you guys" etc, down, but am in need of adding a bit to it in the form of jokes, stories, etc.

 

Anyone got any ideas/suggestions?

 

Stay away from inside jokes that nobody else can relate too

Tell the crowd that the groom has found a woman who shares his immediate goals in life... he has found a woman that will make a terrific mother for his children... he has found a woman that knows how to satisfy him behind closed doors... and he has found a woman that he wants to grow old with. Then for the toast say, "And may those four women never meet!"

My your fire never burn out and your whiskey never run dry.

 

Marriage will teach you many things… loyalty…self restraint…obedience…I am still in daily training on these matters. Add to your vocabulary words like, I was wrong, you were right, it tastes wonderful.

 

Marriage is one of the few institutions that allows a man to do as his wife pleases.

 

Reverend Billy Graham said, "A good marriage is the union of two good forgivers."

 

May we all be invited to your golden wedding celebration!

Edited November 8, 201213 yr by OlDog75
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