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Funniest M*A*S*H One LIners

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Haven't seen the movie in years. My apologies

No need to apologize and if I came off sounding like I was being critical of you I apologize. I just like to show off my knowlege of useless information.

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I just like to show off my knowlege of useless information.
And a fine job you're doing!
It wasn't Oliver "Spearchucker" Jones it was Walt "Painless Pole" Waldowski, the best equipped dentist in Korea. Lt. Dish saved his life.

 

AKA, the "Dental Don Juan Of Detroit."

Any time I'm at a track meet I still am forced at least once to use a line from that movie.

 

Hotlips (as the gun fires to end the half of the football game): Oh my God, they shot him.

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Hawkeye and Trapper; Awww come talk to our uncle Hawkeye. Trapper: And your Aunt Trapper.

Radar: Why can't you sirs act like sirs, sirs?

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Klinger to Radar: You guys don't have any respect for the front line troops, stealing our dresses!!

Any time I'm at a track meet I still am forced at least once to use a line from that movie.

 

Hotlips (as the gun fires to end the half of the football game): Oh my God, they shot him.

 

That, or "I'm in the broad jump, coach!"

PA: The following people have volunteered for todays ten mile physical fitness hike _________(no names) Thank You

Col. Potter asks Radar for a map of landmines around camp...Radar "They are filed under "B" for BOOM"!

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Col. Potter: Mule Fritters!!

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Announcer: Due to the number of people bored last Sunday next Sunday will be canceled.

Potter to Frank and Margaret- you've gone over my head so many times, i have athletes scalp.........

Wasn't that Henry Blake?

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