Are we teaching our sons and daughters self respect? To think about consequences? To choose your friends wisely and build relationships that are grounded in the right things? That you don't need to compromise your integrity or your modesty to try and be popular?

 

I see and hear a lot of really disrespectful things these days by and about teenagers and pre-teens, a lot of it on social media. I feel for them, and I have to shake my heads at some of the parents who not only allow, but seemingly encourage some really provocative behavior.

 

Dealing with technology is a parenting headache too.

 

Is it as bad as it seems to be to me? Any thoughts out there on this issue, or advice for other parents dealing with these struggles?

 

Solidarity may be the key to keeping our sanity.

As a parent, you have to be vigilant, always. We have lots of competition for our kids' attention with all of the social media.

Ask questions. Talk. Ask more questions.

Are we teaching our sons and daughters self respect? To think about consequences? To choose your friends wisely and build relationships that are grounded in the right things? That you don't need to compromise your integrity or your modesty to try and be popular?

 

I see and hear a lot of really disrespectful things these days by and about teenagers and pre-teens, a lot of it on social media. I feel for them, and I have to shake my heads at some of the parents who not only allow, but seemingly encourage some really provocative behavior.

 

Dealing with technology is a parenting headache too.

 

Is it as bad as it seems to be to me? Any thoughts out there on this issue, or advice for other parents dealing with these struggles?

 

Solidarity may be the key to keeping our sanity.

 

To answer your question, I'd say most are teaching it. That probably hasn't changed. What has changed is what is considered to be "respectful."

 

I think message boards/social media have brought out the worst in people especially when it comes to how they talk about kids. The filter is gone with the anonymity. Yes, we can be too lenient with the "kids will be kids" but I'd rather that than what I see/read/hear now when kids make mistakes or do something stupid. We've become so hateful and lack the ability to realize the life is about evolving. A kid does something stupid and now we label him and figure out he is going to be for the entirely of his time remaining on earth.

 

So it's us. Not the kids.

I monitor the phones. I don't care if they don't like it. Just the way it is until they can pay for their own. The phone is a major source of issue for the kids, mine at least. I took the oldest's for a month a couple of years ago. May as well have cut his head off. And his phone behavior either got way better or he got way more sneaky in his approach.

I monitor the phones. I don't care if they don't like it. Just the way it is until they can pay for their own. The phone is a major source of issue for the kids, mine at least. I took the oldest's for a month a couple of years ago. May as well have cut his head off. And his phone behavior either got way better or he got way more sneaky in his approach.

 

I have zero problem with parents monitoring or even spying on their kids. None.

To answer your question, I'd say most are teaching it. That probably hasn't changed. What has changed is what is considered to be "respectful."

 

I think message boards/social media have brought out the worst in people especially when it comes to how they talk about kids. The filter is gone with the anonymity. Yes, we can be too lenient with the "kids will be kids" but I'd rather that than what I see/read/hear now when kids make mistakes or do something stupid. We've become so hateful and lack the ability to realize the life is about evolving. A kid does something stupid and now we label him and figure out he is going to be for the entirely of his time remaining on earth.

 

So it's us. Not the kids.

I concur completely.

I have zero problem with parents monitoring or even spying on their kids. None.

 

I told him when it happened, I'm only legally required to provide you food and shelter and make sure you're not a school truant. And that's what you've made me do. It's up to you to determine the length.

And why in the world do six year-olds need phones, anyway?

Fight to keep the communication lines open...at all costs. Have family meals as often as possible (with no cell phones at the table). Compliment and praise children in front of them and other kids and adults. Save criticism and correction for private one on one discussions. Have family dreams and goals and individual ones too...discuss them openly...plan how to help each other achieve goals together. Pray, go to church services and other events...as a family. Celebrate how special each child is...their individual talents and personality...recognize how important each of them is to the family unit. That's what we did with our two sons and they turned out fine.

And why in the world do six year-olds need phones, anyway?

 

We have to update 10th Region basketball games is why.

A kid does something stupid and now we label him and figure out he is going to be for the entirely of his time remaining on earth.

 

This is huge and your assessment is spot-on IMO.

 

And I think, as a parent, you unfortunately have to prepare a kid for that--how people will try to define you by your shortcomings and mistakes. And I think it's an incredible challenge to effectively accomplish.