Saw this on Twitter a bit ago and thought it would make an interesting topic here.

 

What are the most popular lies we tell kids?

"I'm going to turn this car around if you don't stop."

"Keep making that face and it will freeze like that."

Babies come from watermelon seeds. I cant get my wife to stop eating watermelon, all summer long its been watermelon watermelon, watermelon. Were gonna end up pregnant for sure.

Daddy's not hurting Mommy. We were wrestling.

When I was your age...

Easter Bunny

Santa Claus

Tooth Fairy

 

Elvis is dead

Children should be seen and not heard.

I didn't do ____________ when I was your age. Pick a vice.

Daddy's not hurting Mommy. We were wrestling.

 

Wont be able to use this line on my kids when that time comes around, they will know better.

"The proper peeing posture is standing on one leg."

"The proper peeing posture is standing on one leg."

 

You just can't tell them that too early. Need good leg strength.

When I was your age, I walked to school in the snow without shoes uphill ten miles both ways.

"If I get to 3....1......2......"

"I have no idea what happened to your Halloween candy."