My father did a great job with me I think. He introduced me to sports at an early age (didn't make me play at all, I just loved them) and he was mainly a support kinda guy. He never pushed me to practice or play anything, but he was always willing to rebound for me, pitch baseball to me so I could bat, or throw the bombs to me so I could work on catching a football. He did, however, push me to do anything that I did to the best of my ability and to not quit. If I was at any kind of practice and started complaining or whining about wanting to go home, he would say, "HEY, you wanted to play this or that sport, practice hard so you get better and it will pay off in the long run". I would finish practice hard, and sure enough, he instilled a work ethic in me that allowed me to become a (toot toot) very good all around athlete.

That's fantastic mcpapa. Congrats to your son. I'm sure you are very proud.

 

Thanks for the kind words. I guess we realized fairly early on that sports weren't going to be his ticket to post-secondary education, and that academics would be the ticket. They say the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, but I never really understood what that means...

 

Interestingly enough, one of the first things that hinted to dear old dad that son was pretty sharp was a day soon after kindergarten started when he started reading articles to me out of the sports section of the local paper.

 

I guess I never got around to answering the original poll question. There are certainly many, many parents that live life vicariously through their children. The keys are not to push too hard, be realistic, nurture the interests and talents that your children do have, and to always support them.

Speaking for myself...Yes and No.

 

Halloween, Christmas, Holidays, summertime, schooltime, memories and parallel of childhood activities - yes. Sports, not really too much. As a parent I support and facilitate what they state as their goals, and sometimes remind them and hold them to their commitments. I consider that parenting not re-living.

It happens all the time, especially with a father and the sports they didn't play.

That's fantastic mcpapa. Congrats to your son. I'm sure you are very proud.

 

 

I'll second that. Outstanding mcpapa - that will take your son far!

 

As to the poll question - I try not to. I certainly feel my children's successes and failures - I laugh and cry with them. But my life is separate from theirs.

I can't really vote yes or no, because some do, some don't. It's not a black/white issue.

 

But I can say, from very close observation, that far too many do, and far too many place unreasonable expectations on their children as a result. The ones who do try to live vicariously through their children also quite frequently think far too highly of their child's abilities w/re to future scholarships and professional careers, ignoring the fact that the odds are stacked overwhelmingly against their child ever playing minute one of college ball.

 

My favorite time of year to see this stuff is during youth league baseball, when some overbearing dad stands by the fence and barks out instructions to his son or daughter while they're in the on-deck circle. Of course, more often than not, that child is either looking right through his dad and tuning him out, or not even looking at him and rolling his eyes in the process.

 

Is it any wonder so many kids get burnt out on sports?

Very good observation.:thumb:

I had a great childhood. Mom and Dad did a good job. I was happy, and am pretty happy now. I therefore replicate things Mom and Dad did with me, with my own sons. There are alterations and adjustments, but we eat meals the same way, take the same type of vacations, I approach school and sports with them very similarly. The family recipe has worked, so I'm sticking with it.

Tough one.

Tough one here too. Yes I would say that it must be a good 65% that do . I didn't but I have relatives that do. I wanted my children to be well rounded in what ever they did.