I heard someone use a phrase for "I'm not as stupid as you may think" and it got me to thinking about the various phrases that say that.

 

Growing up my dad always said either "I didn't come to town on a load of pumpkins" and "I didn't just fall off the turnip truck."

 

We've all heard "I was born at night but not last night."

 

Others?

"My Mama didn't raise no fool".

"I wasn't born yesterday".

"I'm not as dumb as I look".

"I'm not as dumb as he/she looks".

"You'd have to wake up pretty early in the morning to fool me".

I'm not dumb. I just have a command of totally useless information.

I'm not stupid. I'm just too lazy to show how smart I am.

"I ain't as dumb as you look".

I'm not suffering from insanity. I'm enjoying every minute of it.

I'm not clumsy. The floor just hates me, the table and chairs are bullies, and the walls get in my way.

I was born at night. Just not last night

I'm not as think as you drunk I am !

A small fry shy of a happy meal.

 

Elevator doesn't reach the top floor.

 

The lights are on, but no one's home.

I heard the turnip truck like pretty often growing up. I also remember these...

 

This ain't my first trip to town.

This ain't my first rodeo.

You gotta get up pretty early in the mornin' to fool me.