I heard about this thread and when I read it I was like OMG!! I called a friend of mine whose niece plays for Ryle and asked her if she had seen it. She told me that her niece read the post and said “Coach never said that. That is a bunch of made up stuff and lies. All of us including our parents sign written rules and one is what colors we wear to practice. It has to be team colors and she was asked to change her shirt one time at practice. That is all that was said or done to her all year. She (player) never got in trouble or was punished at practices or made fun of by coaches to the team. Her mother came to practice one day and yelled at the coaches during practice but they ignored her”.

My friend then told me some of the stuff that happened this year. There were several adult witnesses to the alleged physical event between player and coach and they said the coach did nothing inappropriate. An investigation was conducted and lots of players and parents were interviewed and your claim could not be substantiated. My friend then told me that your daughter has played for four softball seasons and one basketball season for these coaches. Her niece has played for three years and these players’ parents were always supportive of the coaches until a week into this year’s softball season. Parents allowed daughter to remain on the team all year and even played in the state tournament even when her mom went on bluegrass and said daughter was miserable, coaches being mean, etc. Just a real mess and the mother will not let it go.

As a mother of three I have to ask the question” if the coaches are so bad why let your daughter remain on the team”? You filed all these complaints and grievances but did not remove daughter from the environment that is so toxic???? I also find it very hard to believe that a coach would make such a statement when he has a teenage daughter on the team. According to my friend’s niece the coach NEVER made a statement about weakness and rape, those words were never put together. This is a horrible accusation to post and to accuse someone of making this statement, especially when you did not personally hear the discussion. This is indefensible. It is one thing to criticize decisions of a coach but to defame someone’s reputation is deplorable. To think, if I had not known someone to call and check out your claims I would have thought this coach was horrible.

After hearing from my friend that what you posted are unsubstantiated claims (lies), according to her niece and others I called an attorney friend of mine and read him the post you wrote. He said he would need to know more details but these posted comments may rise to the level of libel, especially if these accusations have been reviewed by school administration, an investigation was conducted and the claims not substantiated. I may not be an attorney but it seems to me that these coaches have a strong case if they choose to pursue legal action.

I heard about this thread and when I read it I was like OMG!! I called a friend of mine whose niece plays for Ryle and asked her if she had seen it. She told me that her niece read the post and said “Coach never said that. That is a bunch of made up stuff and lies. All of us including our parents sign written rules and one is what colors we wear to practice. It has to be team colors and she was asked to change her shirt one time at practice. That is all that was said or done to her all year. She (player) never got in trouble or was punished at practices or made fun of by coaches to the team. Her mother came to practice one day and yelled at the coaches during practice but they ignored her”.

My friend then told me some of the stuff that happened this year. There were several adult witnesses to the alleged physical event between player and coach and they said the coach did nothing inappropriate. An investigation was conducted and lots of players and parents were interviewed and your claim could not be substantiated. My friend then told me that your daughter has played for four softball seasons and one basketball season for these coaches. Her niece has played for three years and these players’ parents were always supportive of the coaches until a week into this year’s softball season. Parents allowed daughter to remain on the team all year and even played in the state tournament even when her mom went on bluegrass and said daughter was miserable, coaches being mean, etc. Just a real mess and the mother will not let it go.

As a mother of three I have to ask the question” if the coaches are so bad why let your daughter remain on the team”? You filed all these complaints and grievances but did not remove daughter from the environment that is so toxic???? I also find it very hard to believe that a coach would make such a statement when he has a teenage daughter on the team. According to my friend’s niece the coach NEVER made a statement about weakness and rape, those words were never put together. This is a horrible accusation to post and to accuse someone of making this statement, especially when you did not personally hear the discussion. This is indefensible. It is one thing to criticize decisions of a coach but to defame someone’s reputation is deplorable. To think, if I had not known someone to call and check out your claims I would have thought this coach was horrible.

After hearing from my friend that what you posted are unsubstantiated claims (lies), according to her niece and others I called an attorney friend of mine and read him the post you wrote. He said he would need to know more details but these posted comments may rise to the level of libel, especially if these accusations have been reviewed by school administration, an investigation was conducted and the claims not substantiated. I may not be an attorney but it seems to me that these coaches have a strong case if they choose to pursue legal action.

 

 

You wouldn't think with a daughter on the team that sort of thing would be said, would you? But when you have administrators over this educator even making statements that he speaks before he thinks, I guess it shouldn't shock anyone. Instead of talking to one girl, talk to multiple girls on the team at that game. I know I have and talked to parents on the team that overheard players discussing the statement the day it was made.

 

If they pursue legal action, they pursue it. I guess at that point, the actual truth comes out, doesn't it????

After a lost game, telling the entire team that they pray none of the athletes are ever raped, because they are too weak to do anything about it.

 

 

So I'm the only one that thinks that a coach telling this to high school girls demands removal of the coach IMMEDIATELY?

The fact that a coach would even think that and then have no problem saying it is crazy. Nothing old school about that comment.

No, you're not. But that would make me have suspicions if it was said that way. Not saying it wasn't! Just makes me suspicious. There obviously had to be plenty of witnesses in this case. I would find it very hard to believe if that statement was escalated even one level up in ANY program that the coach would be fired on the spot.

 

I'd also need much more definition on "the touch" Coaches can be very passionate about a sport and making elite athletes better. I am from the old school mentality and I feel that athletes need to be pushed. How many stories do you hear from past athletes that they didn't realize how close they really were and wish they had someone to push them. How many successful (post high school) athletes can look back and reflect on "that one coach" that really pushed them? I have no problem with a passionate coach touching my daugther in an frustrated state. As long as it's not abusive or sexual in manner, I am fine with it. I have often grabbed a girl in a bball practice and said "look, you are playing over here and I have told you that you need to be over here" I have grabbed them and moved them to the area I wanted them in. I didn't hurt them, I was just letting them know that I'm pretty frustrated with them because I have probably told them several times and see them making the same mistake over and over. They don't look at it as abusive, it's more of a way for them to understand, I'm serious this time!!!

 

Perfect example in my opinion...Pike and Towles. Pike seemed to have everything handed to him and never had to face failure or negative feedback. Towles worked very hard and I'm sure was pushed by his coaches along the way. How'd that turn out for each young man?

 

I can't stand the new mentality of "everyone gets a trophy" and "everything is okay little Johnny". "Your're doing you're best. Keep trying!"! It drives me nuts!!! I'm all for positive reinforcment. I live by the 1 negative, 2 positive philosophy. But the most successful athletes are pushed everyday, can take feedback (negative or positive) and creates a work ethic with the incentive that there is always someone better out there and one day I will run into them on the field or court. I need to be prepared!

 

Agree 100%.

 

With girls this can be done more than once.:lol:

 

Just like I tell the girls I help coach, "the moment I stop yelling at you is the moment I could care less if your on the team." I also let them know beforehand that if I have to yell at them it's not because I don't like them and DO NOT take it personal, but because it's not the 1st time I've had to tell them something they did wrong.

After a lost game, telling the entire team that they pray none of the athletes are ever raped, because they are too weak to do anything about it.

 

 

So I'm the only one that thinks that a coach telling this to high school girls demands removal of the coach IMMEDIATELY?

 

IMVHO, I would ask the coach to next time please use another analogy, but no need for removal. We have all had those days when things are not going our way and we are frustrated and then something just sets us off and we say something we shouldn't. We are all guilty of saying things that we wish we wouldn't have said, I would think this is one of them for said coach. I know we are talking high school girls, but Judas H. Priest, they see worse on TV and hear worse in the "crap music" they listen to.

 

However, if this kind of terminology is used on a regular basis well then now we have some issues.

IMVHO, I would ask the coach to next time please use another analogy, but no need for removal. We have all had those days when things are not going our way and we are frustrated and then something just sets us off and we say something we shouldn't. We are all guilty of saying things that we wish we wouldn't have said, I would think this is one of them for said coach. I know we are talking high school girls, but Judas H. Priest, they see worse on TV and hear worse in the "crap music" they listen to.

 

However, if this kind of terminology is used on a regular basis well then now we have some issues.

 

Lawnboy, most of the time I agree with you. Guess this is one that we just don't see eye to eye. What if the day is bad enough that we do something physical? If we can't control our mouth, who is to say that we can control our actions? If we have a bad day at work and tell the boss to go shove their head where the sun doesn't shine, should we expect no consequences, or the boss just chalks it up as we are having a bad day? If it were a math teacher telling room full of students the very same statement because the students all just bombed the algebra final, would this statement still be okay? The teacher was just having a bad day because now the crap test scores are a reflection on his/her teaching skills, right?

 

When does it come a time that excuses stop being made for bad behavior and consequences occur?

 

Almost forgot this one.....with this thought process, a senior shouldn't be kicked off the team for saying her coach was a female dog. Not even heard by the coach, just told to the coach by someone and was honest when asked by that coach if it was said. Never should have been removed from the team, she was just having a bad day, right?

Edited August 7, 201214 yr by SoftballFan14

Lawnboy, most of the time I agree with you. Guess this is one that we just don't see eye to eye. What if the day is bad enough that we do something physical? If we can't control our mouth, who is to say that we can control our actions? If we have a bad day at work and tell the boss to go shove their head where the sun doesn't shine, should we expect no consequences, or the boss just chalks it up as we are having a bad day? If it were a math teacher telling room full of students the very same statement because the students all just bombed the algebra final, would this statement still be okay? The teacher was just having a bad day because now the crap test scores are a reflection on his/her teaching skills, right?

 

When does it come a time that excuses stop being made for bad behavior and consequences occur?

 

Almost forgot this one.....with this thought process, a senior shouldn't be kicked off the team for saying her coach was a female dog. Not even heard by the coach, just told to the coach by someone and was honest when asked by that coach if it was said. Never should have been removed from the team, she was just having a bad day, right?

 

You make great points and in those situations I can't really argue. It's a sad situation all around.

I also have a relative that chose to leave the Ryle program because of what she perceived was poor judgement on the coaches part. Also she and her parents tell me that other girls continue to leave as well. In terms of BB I think this is the third player in 2 years. Now anyone can say that the programs have been successful but like anything else success is relative. If girls want to leave their friends and one of the best academic schools in the region consistently then seems to me something needs to be reviewed. Only consistent thing I have seen throughout all these threads is that Ryle has a head strong coach and administration that need to take a good hard look at themselves in a mirror. This is not just one incident but just another of many!!!!!

Things have never been bad enough to make a comment about rape. No excuse, IF true.

My then 6th grader was suspended from school for a day for using the word "RAPE". I believe the standard of accountability should be higher for adult leaders of youth. Period.

These are what if's, but what if the following happened in the course of a season or practice?

 

Coach told a player to get here fat *&* off the court. I've seen faster turtles.

Coach smelled a player and said you stink, get off of my court. You are not worthy.

 

Would these be reasons to transfer? Are these examples of "crossing the line"?

 

Just curious.

These are what if's, but what if the following happened in the course of a season or practice?

 

Coach told a player to get here fat *&* off the court. I've seen faster turtles.

Coach smelled a player and said you stink, get off of my court. You are not worthy.

 

Would these be reasons to transfer? Are these examples of "crossing the line"?

 

Just curious.

 

No reason to transfer IMO. Reason to question whether the coach had a mentality of a 6th grader, but not to transfer.

Crosses the line big time. Immediate grounds for dismissal.

 

It's a four letter word defined as forcefully violating a person. The sex of the coach and player does not matter.

These are what if's, but what if the following happened in the course of a season or practice?

 

Coach told a player to get here fat *&* off the court. I've seen faster turtles.

Coach smelled a player and said you stink, get off of my court. You are not worthy.

 

Would these be reasons to transfer? Are these examples of "crossing the line"?

 

Just curious.

 

That's a good one. :lol:

 

In all seriousness, I think it would depend on the coach and what kind of a rapport he/she has with the players.

These are what if's, but what if the following happened in the course of a season or practice?

 

Coach told a player to get here fat *&* off the court. I've seen faster turtles.

Coach smelled a player and said you stink, get off of my court. You are not worthy.

 

Would these be reasons to transfer? Are these examples of "crossing the line"?

 

Just curious.

 

Not sure about transferring but this is still very inapropriate.