As far as you know it does.

 

Exactly. :lol2:

As far as you know it does.

 

My 12 year old stepdaughter ran from a boy who asked her to dance, at the valentines dance because she didn't know if I would allow it. I didn't even ban dancing, but I guess my message is working.

delete

I will say that girls are MUCH more aggressive then when I was in High School. They are no longer the "brake" to the boys "gas". It is this age of self exposure. Getting inappropriate texts, instagram messages or whatever is so common that my boys don't even get shocked by it. They even delete them. They aren't alone. That is one thing that changed, both sides are seeming to forget about a semblance of modesty and secrecy.

There is a level of intimacy that comes with sex that teenagers are ill-equipped to handle. They just haven't matured enough emotionally. When that attachment is broken after a longish relationship there can be real difficulty in dealing with it. Abstinence should be taught, girls need to be told how to say "No" and boys need to be told to respect their dates enough not to push the boundaries of physical intimacy.

@mexitucky makes a very good point about the impact of electronics on the kinds of pressures our kids experience. First of all, they can sit there and text one another all night long and you not know it. This means they spend hours "talking" on the phone each night. Do they take their smart phones to their bedroom? What are they doing with that. Snap chat allows the exchange of pictures. You can send a picture or screen capture via direct message on twitter. I don't know what all can be done with instagram but I am sure lots of photos are exchanged there. Perhaps someone who knows could clue us in on whether they can pass private photos that way. Then there is skype and similar type of realtime viewing and chatting. Is their laptop in their bedroom? What do they do with that after everyone else is asleep? Sexting is far more common than most adults know. Imagine the shame when a photo that was snapped for a boyfriend, who is now an ex-boyfriend, is shared with other boys.

 

I am ignorant and naive when it comes to the use of technology but I have learned that kids today have means of communication I never dreamed of as a teen. This is only a tool and can be used for good or evil. In the hands of an immature teen it often brings unintended harm. I made a decision before my kids had cell phones to get them a phone that only had calling and texting ability. No smart phones for my kids. None of them had a laptop before college. They used the computer we have sitting in an open, public location. Get NetNanny for their devices. It doesn't slow down their devices like some of the older monitoring programs did. I also snooped. I wanted to know if they were into something before it became too late. They knew I would look at their stuff. I told them ahead of time this would occur. It was a condition for them to keep the device. I knew their passwords to the device. I know you can't stop them if they are determined. But I believe that deterrents are positive and so I made myself a deterrent.

 

And I have a good relationship with all my kids. We talk about anything. They didn't always like my methods, but they saw the wisdom in my approach.

There is a level of intimacy that comes with sex that teenagers are ill-equipped to handle. They just haven't matured enough emotionally. When that attachment is broken after a longish relationship there can be real difficulty in dealing with it. Abstinence should be taught, girls need to be told how to say "No" and boys need to be told to respect their dates enough not to push the boundaries of physical intimacy.

@mexitucky makes a very good point about the impact of electronics on the kinds of pressures our kids experience. First of all, they can sit there and text one another all night long and you not know it. This means they spend hours "talking" on the phone each night. Do they take their smart phones to their bedroom? What are they doing with that. Snap chat allows the exchange of pictures. You can send a picture or screen capture via direct message on twitter. I don't know what all can be done with instagram but I am sure lots of photos are exchanged there. Perhaps someone who knows could clue us in on whether they can pass private photos that way. Then there is skype and similar type of realtime viewing and chatting. Is their laptop in their bedroom? What do they do with that after everyone else is asleep? Sexting is far more common than most adults know. Imagine the shame when a photo that was snapped for a boyfriend, who is now an ex-boyfriend, is shared with other boys.

 

I am ignorant and naive when it comes to the use of technology but I have learned that kids today have means of communication I never dreamed of as a teen. This is only a tool and can be used for good or evil. In the hands of an immature teen it often brings unintended harm. I made a decision before my kids had cell phones to get them a phone that only had calling and texting ability. No smart phones for my kids. None of them had a laptop before college. They used the computer we have sitting in an open, public location. Get NetNanny for their devices. It doesn't slow down their devices like some of the older monitoring programs did. I also snooped. I wanted to know if they were into something before it became too late. They knew I would look at their stuff. I told them ahead of time this would occur. It was a condition for them to keep the device. I knew their passwords to the device. I know you can't stop them if they are determined. But I believe that deterrents are positive and so I made myself a deterrent.

 

And I have a good relationship with all my kids. We talk about anything. They didn't always like my methods, but they saw the wisdom in my approach.

 

You parent like we do... You can't be lazy and assuming. You always have to be on your job. You did the right things.