I agree 100% with the bolded statement. "Complete appreciation" is key in that sentence.

 

That doesn't change the fact that often parents are quick to say those of us without children can't possibly understand what it's like to be a parent at all. That simply isn't true.

 

Not being a parent doesn't necessarily mean you don't understand the skills, the responsibilities, of parenting. There is no way you understand the unconditional love and emotions involved without being responsible on a daily basis 24/7 for a child. Just watching your child compete, perform, etc. can be extremely nerve racking due to those things. I do not want my child to fail, even though he/she will many times along the line, which is really a good thing in the long run. Watching my son miss a penalty kick during a shootout in a state high school tournament game was absolute torture for me. He was devastated but bounced back, still it was torture on me. No way you replicate that not being a parent.

 

I can understand the problems, concerns, racism that goes with being a minority of color in this country, but I cannot truly feel their emotions or thoughts about this because I am a white male in a country that vastly favors white males.

How long does one have to be a parent for, in order to have "complete appreciation" or "get it"?

 

Does HT have it? Does the person who has been a parent since January have it? Does someone who had a kid a month ago have it?

 

Inquiring minds want to know.

Apparently, it doesn't count. It's not 24/7.

 

I'm still waiting on you to point out the fallacy of my generalization. Tell us how either not having children or babysitting your nephew gives you the same experience as being a parent. (Hint: Singing or playing bass guitar isn't relevant)

How long does one have to be a parent for, in order to have "complete appreciation" or "get it"?

 

Does HT have it? Does the person who has been a parent since January have it? Does someone who had a kid a month ago have it?

 

Inquiring minds want to know.

 

HT is certainly in the club with many more experiences coming his way. He's living it 24/7. He's in.

I believe I have a good bit of experience taking care of children.

 

That doesn't mean I think I have a full appreciation. I know better.

 

We agree. You may have more experience than most non-parents.

Given the reaction to recent events, I also want to add, sometimes no one is to blame. Just because the parents aren't to blame, doesn't mean that automatically we need or should assume blame lies elsewhere. Sometimes, crap just happens.

 

And I agree with Habib.

 

And I agree with Deuce and UKMF.

I'm still waiting on you to point out the fallacy of my generalization. Tell us how either not having children or babysitting your nephew gives you the same experience as being a parent. (Hint: Singing or playing bass guitar isn't relevant)

 

I'm pretty sure plantman already shot holes in your generalization. It's kinda humorous seeing you making sweeping generalizations when you are so quick to jump on anyone else on here for doing the same thing.

 

You're absolutely right, I don't have a kid. That doesn't mean I don't understand the responsibilities involved, it doesn't mean I don't understand that it's a 24/7 job, that it requires my utmost attention at all times. It doesn't mean I don't realize that honest mistakes happen, and it's not because of bad of parenting, it's just that, mistakes.

I guess I didn't think I needed to say "in general" but I guess I did. Exceptions to every rule. God bless you for being an exception. My point still stands.

 

So which side of the fence am I on? Everyone has to be on a side of the fence right?

I'm pretty sure plantman already shot holes in your generalization. It's kinda humorous seeing you making sweeping generalizations when you are so quick to jump on anyone else on here for doing the same thing.

 

You're absolutely right, I don't have a kid. That doesn't mean I don't understand the responsibilities involved, it doesn't mean I don't understand that it's a 24/7 job, that it requires my utmost attention at all times. It doesn't mean I don't realize that honest mistakes happen, and it's not because of bad of parenting, it's just that, mistakes.

 

You're smart enough to know there are different levels of "sweeping generalizations."

 

"All Muslims believe...." or "All Muslims are terrorists" are gross generalizations not supported by logic or fact.

 

Saying a non-parent (or a non-guardian as in Plantman's case) do not have a full appreciation of what it takes to be a parent is not only NOT a gross generalization but it's also correct by it's very definition.

 

I know the following about being a police officer:

 

It's a tough job.

It requires a lot of sacrifice on the family.

You can die.

It's highly scrutinized.

 

None of that gives me a full appreciation of what I would do in a heated environment even though my dad was an officer. Until you walk in the shoes 24/7 you're just speculating.

If I have an opinion that is the same as someone else who does have kids, does that make my opinion valid, or is their opinion valid, but my same opinion invalid? Or are both of our opinions invalid, because they're agreeing with someone who doesn't have kids?

So which side of the fence am I on? Everyone has to be on a side of the fence right?

 

Are you asking do I give your opinion more credence because of your situation with your niece? Absolutely. It doesn't mean I agree with it but you get more of a benefit of the doubt when I question perspective vs a single cat.

If I have an opinion that is the same as someone else who does have kids, does that make my opinion valid, or is their opinion valid, but my same opinion invalid? Or are both of our opinions invalid, because they're agreeing with someone who doesn't have kids?

 

Depends on how you got there.

So does my opinion magically become more valid six months from now? Or is there like a waiting period that I have to get through before I get to join the club?

 

I'm not trying to be smart, or difficult. I'm seriously trying to a) understand why me not having kids makes my opinion invalid, and b) does it go from invalid to valid overnight once I do?

So does my opinion magically become more valid six months from now? Or is there like a waiting period that I have to get through before I get to join the club?

 

Oh, it won't take long for your membership card to arrive. It's not gradual.

So does my opinion magically become more valid six months from now? Or is there like a waiting period that I have to get through before I get to join the club?

 

I'm not trying to be smart, or difficult. I'm seriously trying to a) understand why me not having kids makes my opinion invalid, and b) does it go from invalid to valid overnight once I do?

 

Depends, you plan on dangling your baby to play with the gators?