Let's talk about the state of high school sports. Multiple coaches in a wide range of sports have left or been told to leave their jobs in just the past few months. It seems like more than usual to me. What is going on?

Parents - Unrealistic expectations for Johnny and Jill? How should everyone (coach, AD, Principal, other parents) respond to the testy parents? How should the other parents respond? How can parents support the players, coaches and school?

Coaches - What a juggling act is required! I feel coaches are right in the middle fighting battles on all fronts. Just win? But how to do it "the right way"? Manage the star, the team player, the disgruntled player, parents of all, admins getting involved, on and on. Should there be a behavior and management model that all parties know about before a season starts? Something written in everyone's hands? What should the model be for all these variables? A LOT to consider and discuss.

Admins - When should admins be involved? On what level? When and how should they respond to the tough parent and coach situations? 

Let's talk!

And in all that intro, I didn't even talk about the most important part of the equation where everything should be focused - the athletes. How do you handle all the different level of athletes that a coach deals with on every team? 

8 hours ago, Voice of Reason said:

Let's talk about the state of high school sports. Multiple coaches in a wide range of sports have left or been told to leave their jobs in just the past few months. It seems like more than usual to me. What is going on?

Parents - Unrealistic expectations for Johnny and Jill? How should everyone (coach, AD, Principal, other parents) respond to the testy parents? How should the other parents respond? How can parents support the players, coaches and school?

Coaches - What a juggling act is required! I feel coaches are right in the middle fighting battles on all fronts. Just win? But how to do it "the right way"? Manage the star, the team player, the disgruntled player, parents of all, admins getting involved, on and on. Should there be a behavior and management model that all parties know about before a season starts? Something written in everyone's hands? What should the model be for all these variables? A LOT to consider and discuss.

Admins - When should admins be involved? On what level? When and how should they respond to the tough parent and coach situations? 

Let's talk!

Yes some parents can be a problem, but not all, and this isn't new.  It' always been this way.  I think the biggest problem in todays world is social media and it's not going away.  If you want to coach in todays climate you better have thick skin.  The ones that don't are leaving.

I think anytime someone else has to step or may have been asked to step in, this action should be discussed as a private matter.

9 hours ago, Voice of Reason said:

And in all that intro, I didn't even talk about the most important part of the equation where everything should be focused - the athletes. How do you handle all the different level of athletes that a coach deals with on every team? 

This is no different than what every teacher has to solve every day.

11 hours ago, Voice of Reason said:

 

Coaches -  Should there be a behavior and management model that all parties know about before a season starts? Something written in everyone's hands? What should the model be for all these variables? A LOT to consider and discuss.

 

We have a meeting every May with players and parents. Procedures, standards and schedules will be shared. Role of the parent is spelled out in one page.  Every family will receive a book that will answer most of their questions through the season. 

For 33 seasons as a head coach, 90 - 95 % of the parents have been super at Paris, Mason, Mercer & Anderson. Most of the time, if you communicate and you are fair, it will eventually resolve issues. People still get mad, but they understand better what the coach did and why he did it. 

Sidenote... the past 20 years I have heard how bad the Mercer parents are. Not true. The Mercer parents were just as good as the parents at the other schools. 90-95 % of those parents raised money, supported our coaching decisions, got their kids to early morning practices and did about anything I asked them to do to benefit our program. I may be sensitive about it because it is my hometown. Mercer County gets a bad rap and I have heard about all I want to hear about it. 

 

10 hours ago, ChiefSmoke said:

We have a meeting every May with players and parents. Procedures, standards and schedules will be shared. Role of the parent is spelled out in one page.  Every family will receive a book that will answer most of their questions through the season. 

For 33 seasons as a head coach, 90 - 95 % of the parents have been super at Paris, Mason, Mercer & Anderson. Most of the time, if you communicate and you are fair, it will eventually resolve issues. People still get mad, but they understand better what the coach did and why he did it. 

Sidenote... the past 20 years I have heard how bad the Mercer parents are. Not true. The Mercer parents were just as good as the parents at the other schools. 90-95 % of those parents raised money, supported our coaching decisions, got their kids to early morning practices and did about anything I asked them to do to benefit our program. I may be sensitive about it because it is my hometown. Mercer County gets a bad rap and I have heard about all I want to hear about it. 

 

In your role of the parent document, do you talk about what the parent and/or player should do if they are upset about something?

Also, have you ever done a podcast on this topic?

Yes. If it is PT…. Player meets w/ position coach. Most of the time, that addresses the problem. 

if it is NOT PT, the parents need to let me know what is going on… or the player. 

Last week… had a player unhappy about something at the school level. I told him what I would tell my sons, seek out the adult, have a polite conversation about your concern. 

Getting kids to address their concerns instead of Mom or Dad is a huge growth opportunity. 
 

One of my boys had not been kind to a young lady. Took him to house to apologize. The Mom starts yelling at me and wants me in on the conversation.  I told her, “I am not the one that screwed up. This is HIS problem! “ I made him handle it. 

Yes. We did an episode on role of the parent. If you cannot find it, message me and I will send a link! 

2 hours ago, ChiefSmoke said:

Yes. If it is PT…. Player meets w/ position coach. Most of the time, that addresses the problem. 

if it is NOT PT, the parents need to let me know what is going on… or the player. 

Last week… had a player unhappy about something at the school level. I told him what I would tell my sons, seek out the adult, have a polite conversation about your concern. 

Getting kids to address their concerns instead of Mom or Dad is a huge growth opportunity. 
 

One of my boys had not been kind to a young lady. Took him to house to apologize. The Mom starts yelling at me and wants me in on the conversation.  I told her, “I am not the one that screwed up. This is HIS problem! “ I made him handle it. 

Yes. We did an episode on role of the parent. If you cannot find it, message me and I will send a link! 

When one of my sons was playing baseball, his head coach had a players and parents meeting before the season started. Well known, highly respected and successful coach. His biggest message in the meeting was - if any player has an issue, they need to go to the coach first, not the parent. He told the parents if a player has an issue to ask them if they have already talked with the coach about it. Coach said he did not want to hear about an issue from a parent first.

As a parent of multiple kids in sports at the same high school, there is always a meeting before the season ever starts that goes over expectations for us as parents, the athlete and the coaching staff.  We know the steps that will be taken if there was a problem.  The first step is never the parents addressing the coach. The first step is always the athlete having a meeting with their coaches. 

46 minutes ago, Voice of Reason said:

When one of my sons was playing baseball, his head coach had a players and parents meeting before the season started. Well known, highly respected and successful coach. His biggest message in the meeting was - if any player has an issue, they need to go to the coach first, not the parent. He told the parents if a player has an issue to ask them if they have already talked with the coach about it. Coach said he did not want to hear about an issue from a parent first.

I want to add another part to this that I personally struggled with. I was a high school coach for 12 years. Then in 2016 I moved to Beechwood and started coaching 6th and 7th grade. I was not prepared, or at least did not think of, the differences in 12 and 17 year olds. When a couple of questions/problems arose, I required the players to come and talk to me. I did not realize how intimidating it could be for a middle school athlete to approach an adult. They were afraid they would get in trouble for questioning an adult. It was an opportunity of growth for both of us. I may have been asking too much of them. 

4 hours ago, ChiefSmoke said:

Yes. If it is PT…. Player meets w/ position coach. Most of the time, that addresses the problem. 

if it is NOT PT, the parents need to let me know what is going on… or the player. 

Last week… had a player unhappy about something at the school level. I told him what I would tell my sons, seek out the adult, have a polite conversation about your concern. 

Getting kids to address their concerns instead of Mom or Dad is a huge growth opportunity. 
 

One of my boys had not been kind to a young lady. Took him to house to apologize. The Mom starts yelling at me and wants me in on the conversation.  I told her, “I am not the one that screwed up. This is HIS problem! “ I made him handle it. 

Yes. We did an episode on role of the parent. If you cannot find it, message me and I will send a link! 

There might be a job awaiting you in Boone County, they seem to have many problems in multiple schools.

On 5/4/2026 at 1:58 PM, 4 Quarters said:

There might be a job awaiting you in Boone County, they seem to have many problems in multiple schools.

I can guarantee Coach Hauck had no problems with Parents!

Some of my dad stories I’m not always sure are true. This is one of them. 

My dad was an assistant at Lafayette in the late 60s.

He told me once that Coach Hauck was at Lafayette one spring. I think he had planned to become the head coach or he had even done spring practice. At some point, he told my dad, “John this school does not have enough discipline for me to coach here.”

He left Lafayette at that point.

On 5/4/2026 at 3:40 PM, ChiefSmoke said:

I can guarantee Coach Hauck had no problems with Parents!

Some of my dad stories I’m not always sure are true. This is one of them. 

My dad was an assistant at Lafayette in the late 60s.

He told me once that Coach Hauck was at Lafayette one spring. I think he had planned to become the head coach or he had even done spring practice. At some point, he told my dad, “John this school does not have enough discipline for me to coach here.”

He left Lafayette at that point.

Even with his winning ways, might not survive in todays world. LOL