If his death is without doubt ruled a suicide, then the obvious question would be "WHY"???
I don't think that I'll ever understand how someone could take their own life, and especially someone who has so much going for them like Chris.
If someone is dying a long painful terminal illness, then I'd get it. I guess that I have to count my lucky stars that I've never experienced depression so strongly to even come close to considering something like this.
My head is not daily full of sunshine, and I certainly know what it feels like to have mood swings, but I've always had a goal to see how long I can live, and though it's highly unlikely, I keep 100 in my mind as to what I'm aiming for.
I've dreamt of being a rock star ever since I was a kid, and though I didn't make serious attempts of going all the way with it, I have to admit that I idolize those who have.
I'm not so star struck as I was as a kid, and when I see guys like Chris who are my age who have succeeded, I consider them to be a contemporary who I admire for having the motivation to do what they love and follow their dreams, while kicking myself a bit for not really trying myself like I think that I should have.
You'd think that after coming off of the stage one would feel high about having just performed. Even the handful of times that I have, and especially if I felt good about pulling it off, I'd get such a rush from it.
I suppose that once it becomes old hat some can become jaded and no longer feel the buzz from it anymore. Some I suppose could feel that they've felt as high as they're ever going to feel, and that there's not much to strive for anymore.
Probably a cop out on my part to justify doing nothing, but perhaps there's something to be said about keeping a fantasy alive but not really seeing it to fruition. Silly as it sounds, I periodically still dream big for the fun of thinking about it, and then like always turn around and wave it off once more. I catch myself in a childlike moment thinking "When I grow up...etc..."... delusional sure, but it's all in fun.
Though I doubt that sense will ever really be made with Cornell's sudden and unexpected death, I do hope that some light could possibly be shed as to why.